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I don't think you can make a lawyer honest by an act of legislature. You've got to work on his conscience. And his lack of conscience is what makes him a lawyer.

Will Rogers

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Will Rogers
Age: 55 †
Born: 1879
Born: November 4
Died: 1935
Died: August 15
Actor
Film Actor
Film Producer
Journalist
Politician
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Oologah
Oklahoma
William Penn Adair Rogers
William Rogers
Make
Think
Legislature
Thinking
Lawyer
Lack
Conscience
Honest
Makes
Work

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When I make a joke, nobody gets injured... when Congress makes a joke, it's the law.
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Congress meets tomorrow morning. Let us all pray: Oh Lord, give us strength to bear that which is about to be inflicted upon us. Be merciful with them, oh Lord, for they know not what they're doing. Amen.
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It ain't so much what a man doesn't know that causes him so many problems, but what he knows that ain't so.
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Mona Lisa is the only beauty who went through history and retained her reputation.
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It is not the return on my investment that I am concerned about it's the return of my investment
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Where I come from, they won't let me play with this rope. They think I might hurt myself.
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Asking Europe to disarm is like asking a man in Chicago to give up his life insurance.
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I represent what is left of a vanishing race, and that is the pedestrian. That I am still able to be here, I owe to a keen eye and a nimble pair of legs. But I know they'll get me someday.
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The budget is like a mythical bean bag. Congress votes mythical beans into it, then reaches in and tries to pull real ones out.
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If you let women have their way, you will generally get even with them in the end.
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About all I can say for the United States Senate is that it opens with a prayer and closes with an investigation.
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Banking and after-dinner speaking are two of the most nonessential industries we have in this country. I am ready to reform, if they are.
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Whoever said a horse was dumb, was dumb
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The country has gone sane and got back to horses.
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There is something about a Republican that you can only stand him just so long and on the other hand, there is something about a Democrat that you can't stand him quite that long.
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There is no income tax in Russia. But there's no income.
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Pain is such an uncomfortable feeling that even a tiny amount of it is enough to ruin every enjoyment.
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Rotation of crops and less automobiles will relieve the farmers whenever they decide to try it.
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We have killed more people celebrating our independence day than we lost fighting for it.
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You know, women always could endure more than men. Not only physically, but mentally - did you ever get a peek at some of the husbands?
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