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If there are no dogs in Heaven, then when I die I want to go where they went.

Will Rogers

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Will Rogers
Age: 55 †
Born: 1879
Born: November 4
Died: 1935
Died: August 15
Actor
Film Actor
Film Producer
Journalist
Politician
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Oologah
Oklahoma
William Penn Adair Rogers
William Rogers
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Heaven
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More quotes by Will Rogers

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Parades should be classed as a Nuisance and participants should be subject to a term in prison. They stop more work, inconvenience more people, stop more traffic, cause more accidents, entail more expense, and commit and cause I don't remember the other hundred misdemeanors.
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When the Okies left Oklahoma and moved to California, they raised the average intelligence level in both states.
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The English should give Ireland home rule - and reserve the motion picture rights.
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With Congress, every time they make a joke it's a law, and every time they make a law it's a joke.
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If you don't like the weather in Oklahoma, wait a minute and it'll change.
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A holding company is the people you give your money to while you're being searched.
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The farmer has to be an optimist or he wouldn't still be a farmer.
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Politicians are dumb, but they can count to 50% plus one.
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The man who never makes a mistake must get tired of doing nothing.
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Wall Street is being investigated, but they are not asleep while it's being done. You see where the Senate took that tax off the sales of stocks, didn't you? Saved 'em $48,000,000. Now, why don't somebody investigate the Senate and see who got to them to get that tax removed? That would be a real investigation.
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There have been three great inventions since the beginning of time: fire, the wheel, and central banking.
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There is something about a Republican that you can only stand him just so long and on the other hand, there is something about a Democrat that you can't stand him quite that long.
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A holding company is a thing where you hand an accomplice the goods while the policeman searches you.
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Ammunition beats persuasion when you are looking for freedom.
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When ignorance gets started it knows no bounds.
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Nothing makes a man, or a body of men, as mad as the truth. If there is no truth in it, they laugh it off.
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We all joke about Congress but we can't improve on them. Have you noticed that no matter who we elect, he is just as bad as the one he replaces?
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My forefathers didn't come over on the Mayflower, but they met the boat.
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The only way to solve the traffic problems of the country is to pass a law that only paid-for cars are allowed to use the highways. That would make traffic so scarce, we could use our boulevards for children's playgrounds.
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Now I am not unpatriotic, and I want to do my bit, so I hereby offer my services to my President, my country and my friends to do anything, outside of serving on a commission, that I can in this great movement. But you will have to give me some idea of where confidence is. And just who you want it restored to.
Will Rogers