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If there are no dogs in Heaven, then when I die I want to go where they went.
Will Rogers
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Will Rogers
Age: 55 †
Born: 1879
Born: November 4
Died: 1935
Died: August 15
Actor
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Film Producer
Journalist
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Oklahoma
William Penn Adair Rogers
William Rogers
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More quotes by Will Rogers
The president says, 'There is lots of people worse off than the Farmers.' I don't know who it could be unless it is the fellow who holds the Mortgages on the Farms.
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This thing of being a hero, about the main thing to it is to know when to die.
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The man with the best job in the country is the vice-president. All he has to do is get up every morning and say, 'How is the president?'
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We are here just for a spell and then pass on. So get a few laughs and do the best you can. Live your life so that whenever you lose it, you are ahead.
Will Rogers
And the thing about my jokes is, they don't hurt anybody. You can take 'em or leave 'em - you can say they're funny or they're terrible or they're good, or whatever, but you can just pass 'em by. But with Congress, every time they make a joke, it's a law! And every time they make a law, it's a joke!
Will Rogers
Old Hollywood is just like a desert water in Africa. Hang around long enough and every kind of animal in the world will drift in for refreshments.
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Don't wait to buy land, Buy land and wait. Find out where the people are going and buy the land before they get there.
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I would never make a good economist. You know, an economist is a man that can tell you anything about — well, he will tell you what can happen under any given condition — and his guess is liable to be as good as anybody else's, too.
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Now I am not unpatriotic, and I want to do my bit, so I hereby offer my services to my President, my country and my friends to do anything, outside of serving on a commission, that I can in this great movement. But you will have to give me some idea of where confidence is. And just who you want it restored to.
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You never get a second chance to make a first impression.
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I'm not so much interested in the return ON my money as I am in the return OF my money.
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There is a terrible lot of us who don't think that we come from a monkey, but if there are some people who think that they do, why, it's not our business to rob them of what little pleasure they might get out of imagining it.
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See what will happen if you don't stop biting your fingernails
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There is no more interesting place in the world to meet characters than a movie set.
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America is a nation that conceives many odd inventions for getting somewhere but it can think of nothing to do once it gets there.
Will Rogers
Communism is like prohibition, it is a good idea, but it won't work.
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Our public men are speaking every day on something, but they ain't saying anything.
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This country has come to feel the same when Congress is in session as when the baby gets hold of a hammer.
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Don't gamble take all your savings and buy some good stock and hold it till it goes up, then sell it. If it don't go up, don't buy it.
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Mothers are the only race of people that speak the same tongue. A mother in Manchuria could converse with a mother in Nebraska and never miss a word.
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