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The United States never lost a war or won a conference.

Will Rogers

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Will Rogers
Age: 55 †
Born: 1879
Born: November 4
Died: 1935
Died: August 15
Actor
Film Actor
Film Producer
Journalist
Politician
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Oologah
Oklahoma
William Penn Adair Rogers
William Rogers
States
Never
Conference
Conferences
United
War
Lost

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If Stupidity got us into this mess, then why can't it get us out?
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George Bernard Shaw of England stopped over just long enough to make one speech in Bombay, India, started a war and 100 Indians killed each other. That's what I call good speech-making. The only enthusiasm any of our speakers can rouse is a demand to kill the speaker.
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Last year we said, 'Things can't go on like this', and they didn't, they got worse.
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Politics has become so expensive that it takes a lot of money even to be defeated.
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Originality will be rewarded in any line.
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If all the time consumed in attending dinners and luncheons was consumed in some work, the production of this country would be doubled
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Successful colleges will start laying plans for a new stadium unsuccessful ones will start hunting a new coach
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The Democrats are going to change the name of the Hoover Dam. That is the silliest thing I ever heard of in politics . . . Lord if they feel that way about it, I don't see why they don't just reverse the two words.
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What the Secretary of Agriculture is trying to do is to teach the farmer corn acreage control, and the hogs birth control, and one is just as hard to make understand it as the other.
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Now if there is one thing that we do worse than any other nation, it is try and manage somebody else's affairs.
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Diplomacy is the art of saying 'Nice doggie' until you can find a rock.
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Golf is a wonderful exercise. You can stand on your feet for hours, watching somebody else putt.
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Chaotic action is preferable to orderly inaction.
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My own mother died when I was 10 years old. My folks have told me that what little humor I have comes from her. I can't remember her humor, but I can remember her love and understanding of me.
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A comedian can only last till he either takes himself serious or his audience takes him serious.
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Civilization has taught us to eat with a fork, but even now if nobody is around we use our fingers.
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Nothing makes a man, or a body of men, as mad as the truth. If there is no truth in it, they laugh it off.
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Be a politician no training necessary.
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The good old horse-and-buggy days: then you lived until you died and not until you were run over.
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It's almost worth the Great Depression to learn how little our big men know.
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