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Take the diplomacy out of war and the thing would fall flat in a week.

Will Rogers

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Will Rogers
Age: 55 †
Born: 1879
Born: November 4
Died: 1935
Died: August 15
Actor
Film Actor
Film Producer
Journalist
Politician
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Oologah
Oklahoma
William Penn Adair Rogers
William Rogers
Fall
Antiwar
Political
Flat
Take
Flats
Thing
Inspiration
Would
Week
Politics
Peace
Diplomats
War
Diplomacy

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It's easy being a humorist when you've got the whole government working for you.
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We all joke about Congress but we can't improve on them. Have you noticed that no matter who we elect, he is just as bad as the one he replaces?
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Shrewdness in public life all over the world is always honored, while honesty in public men is generally attributed to dumbness and is seldom rewarded.
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A woman can make a man feel older or younger than his years if she so chooses. Being a woman is a terribly difficult task since it consists principally in dealing with men. Women were made with a sense of humor so they could love men instead of laughing at them.
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It's the greatest game I ever saw. You can't lose. Everybody buys to sell and nobody buys to keep. What's worrying me is who is going to be the last owner. It's just like an auction the only one stuck is the last one.
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We are all here for a spell, get all the good laughs you can.
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Of course nothing is ever done about a [presidential] commission report, except, they say, once a man at the state prison for the criminally insane actually read one once clear through. Then he did something about it. He made a bonfire that lasted a week.
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Rumor travels faster, but it don't stay put as long as truth.
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Farmers have more Associations, and Bureaus, and Clubs, than they have pitchforks.
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But we can't alibi all our ills by just knocking the old banker. First he loaned the money, then the people all at once wanted it back, and he didn't have it. Now he's got it again, and is afraid to loan it, so the poor devil don't know what to do.
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The man with the best job in the country is the vice-president. All he has to do is get up every morning and say, 'How is the president?'
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People should be more concerned with the return of their principal than the return on their principal.
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If we got one-tenth of what was promised to us in these acceptance speeches there wouldn't be any inducement to go to heaven.
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Congress meets tomorrow morning. Let us all pray: Oh Lord, give us strength to bear that which is about to be inflicted upon us. Be merciful with them, oh Lord, for they know not what they're doing. Amen.
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If you let women have their way, you will generally get even with them in the end.
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Rotation of crops and less automobiles will relieve the farmers whenever they decide to try it.
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Those tax-exempt bonds were put in so that a town or a state or a government could sell more bonds than it ought to.
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The public perceives there are problems with the water system, and with the efficiency of the system. We need some leadership and to provide expertise in the area of efficiency.
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It is a good thing that we do not get as much government as we pay for.
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Asking Europe to disarm is like asking a man in Chicago to give up his life insurance.
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