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It's easy being a humorist when you've got the whole government working for you.

Will Rogers

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Will Rogers
Age: 55 †
Born: 1879
Born: November 4
Died: 1935
Died: August 15
Actor
Film Actor
Film Producer
Journalist
Politician
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Oologah
Oklahoma
William Penn Adair Rogers
William Rogers
Government
Whole
Humorist
Humorists
Humor
Politics
Working
Funny
Easy

More quotes by Will Rogers

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We are always yapping about the 'Good Old Days' and how we look back and enjoy it, but I tell you there is a lot of hooey to it. There is a whole lot of all our past lives that wasn't so hot.
Will Rogers
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Our whole Depression was brought on by gambling, not in the stock market alone but in expanding and borrowing and going in debt... all just to make some easy money quick.
Will Rogers
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Anything important is never left to the vote of the people. We only get to vote on some man we never get to vote on what he is to do.
Will Rogers
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Hurray! Congress is to adjourn! Only four more days of Congressional burglary on the Treasury!
Will Rogers
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Every Gag I tell must be based on truth. No matter how much I may exaggerate it, it must have a certain amount of Truth.... Now Rumor travels Faster, but it don't stay put as long as Truth.
Will Rogers
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Get a sales tax, small on necessities and large on luxuries then a stiff inheritance tax on the fellow that saves and don't spend. That will get him either way. A tax paid on the day you buy is not as tough as asking you for it the next year when you are broke.
Will Rogers
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Those tax-exempt bonds were put in so that a town or a state or a government could sell more bonds than it ought to.
Will Rogers
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A woman can make a man feel older or younger than his years if she so chooses. Being a woman is a terribly difficult task since it consists principally in dealing with men. Women were made with a sense of humor so they could love men instead of laughing at them.
Will Rogers
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Here is my Farm Relief bill: Every time a Southerner plants nothing on his farm but cotton year after year, and the Northerner nothing but wheat or corn, why, take a hammer and hit him twice right between the eyes. You may dent your hammer, but it will do more real good than all the bills you can pass in a year.
Will Rogers
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Too many people spend money they haven't earned to buy things they don't want to impress people they don't like.
Will Rogers
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If you let women have their way, you will generally get even with them in the end.
Will Rogers
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Every man gets an opportunity once in a lifetime.
Will Rogers
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A holding company is the people you give your money to while you're being searched.
Will Rogers
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We owe more money than any Nation in the World, and we are LOWERING TAXES. When is the time to pay off a debt if it is not when you are doing well? You let a Politician return home from Washington and announce, 'Boys we lowered your taxes. We had to borrow the money to do it, but we did it.' Say, they would elect him for life.
Will Rogers
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The minute a thing is long and complicated, it confuses. Whoever wrote the Ten Commandments made 'em short. They may not always be kept, but they are understood.
Will Rogers
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Congress is going to start tinkering with the Ten Commandments just as soon as they find someone in Washington who has read them.
Will Rogers
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Lord, the money we do spend on Government and it's not one bit better than the government we got for one-third the money twenty years ago.
Will Rogers
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The best way to make a fire with two sticks is to make sure one of them is a match.
Will Rogers
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If you get to thinking you're a person of some influence, try ordering somebody else's dog around.
Will Rogers
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Cattlemen have lost more in the last few years than anybody and say less about it.
Will Rogers