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The man with the best job in the country is the vice-president. All he has to do is get up every morning and say, 'How is the president?'

Will Rogers

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Will Rogers
Age: 55 †
Born: 1879
Born: November 4
Died: 1935
Died: August 15
Actor
Film Actor
Film Producer
Journalist
Politician
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Oologah
Oklahoma
William Penn Adair Rogers
William Rogers
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Country
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More quotes by Will Rogers

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It's getting so if a man wants to stand well socially, he can't afford to be seen with either the Democrats or the Republicans.
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... while the Republicans are smart enough to make money, the Democrats are smart enough to get in office every two or three times a century and take it away from 'em.
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If there are no dogs in Heaven, then when I die I want to go where they went.
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When you figure it right down, none of us are in a really essential business but the farmer, and he raises so much that even his business is partly non-essential.
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Rumor travels faster, but it don't stay put as long as truth.
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You never know how much a man can't remember until he is called as a witness.
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I tell you folks, all politics is applesauce.
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A company is known by the people it keeps.
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People should be more concerned with the return of their principal than the return on their principal.
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You can have all the advanced war methods you want, but, after all, nobody has ever invented a war that you don't have to have somebody in the guise of soldiers to stop the bullets.
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Always drink upstream from the herd.
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With old inflation riding the headlines, I have read till I am bleary-eyed, and I can't get head from tails of the whole thing. ... Now we are living in an age of explanations-and plenty of 'em, too-but no two things that's been done to us have been explained twice the same way, by even the same man. It's and age of in one ear and out the other.
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People who fly into a rage always make a bad landing.
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When you straddle a thing it takes a long time to explain it.
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Real estate is the best investment in the world because it is the only thing they're not making any more.
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Farmers spend more time at Conventions than they do plowing.
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When you give a lesson in meanness to a critter or a person, don't be surprised if they learn their lesson.
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The man that found the 726-carat diamond in Africa, received $350,000 for it and wants to buy a farm and silk hat. Well, I can understand a man perhaps being eccentric enough to want to own a silk hat.
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I would love to see Mr. (Henry) Ford in there, really. I don't know who started the idea that a President must be a Politician instead of a Business man. A Politician can't run any other kind of business. So there is no reason why he can run the U.S. That's the biggest single business in the World.
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The way to make money in the stock market is to buy a stock. Then, when it goes up, sell it. If it's not going to go up, don't buy it!
Will Rogers