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I bet after seeing us, George Washington would sue us for calling him 'father.'

Will Rogers

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Will Rogers
Age: 55 †
Born: 1879
Born: November 4
Died: 1935
Died: August 15
Actor
Film Actor
Film Producer
Journalist
Politician
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Oologah
Oklahoma
William Penn Adair Rogers
William Rogers
America
Would
George
Washington
Calling
Seeing
Father

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The French couldn't hate us any more unless we helped 'em out in another war.
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Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.
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Never slap a man who is chewing tobacco.
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There is not a better day in the world to be spent than with a lot of wise old cowmen around barbecued beef, black coffee and good free holy beans.
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Old Hollywood is just like a desert water in Africa. Hang around long enough and every kind of animal in the world will drift in for refreshments.
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If a man ain't nothin' else, then he's an artist. It's the only thing he can claim to be that nobody can prove he ain't.
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I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts.
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Originality will be rewarded in any line.
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You've got to go out on a limb sometimes because that's where the fruit is.
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Congress knew Coolidge would veto the farm bill. There was more politics than relief in that bill.
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Live in such a way that you would not be ashamed to sell your parrot to the town gossip.
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Will somebody please tell me what they do with all the Vice-Presidents a bank has? Why the United States is the biggest business institution in the world, and they got only one Vice-President and nobody has ever found anything for him to do.
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I bet any Sunday could be made as popular at church as Easter is if you made 'em fashion shows too. The audience is so busy looking at each other that the preacher just as well recite Gunga Din.
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There is some talk of lowering (the income tax), and they will have to. People are not making enough to pay it.
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There is something about a Republican that you can only stand him just so long and on the other hand, there is something about a Democrat that you can't stand him quite that long.
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Buy land. They ain't making any more of the stuff.
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The only thing that can stop hair from falling ... is the floor.
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A king can stand people's fighting but he can't last long if people start thinking.
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She was so ugly she could make a mule back away from an oat bin.
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Instead of giving money to found colleges to promote learning, why don't they pass a constitutional amendment prohibiting anybody from learning anything? If it works as good as the Prohibition one did, why, in five years we would have the smartest race of people on earth.
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