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I am billed as a humorist, but of course I am a tragedian at heart.
Will Cuppy
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Will Cuppy
Age: 65 †
Born: 1884
Born: August 23
Died: 1949
Died: September 19
Critic
Humorist
Journalist
Literary Critic
Writer
Auburn
Indiana
William Jacob Cuppy
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Heart
Billed
Humorist
Humorists
More quotes by Will Cuppy
Young normal tigers do not eat people. If eaten by a tiger you may rest assured he was abnormal.
Will Cuppy
The stork is voiceless because there is really nothing to say.
Will Cuppy
It's easy to see the faults in people, I know and it's harder to see the good. Especially when the good isn't there.
Will Cuppy
My philosophy of life can be summed up in four words: It can't be helped.
Will Cuppy
All Modern Men are descended from a Wormlike creature but it shows more on some people.
Will Cuppy
I do not travel. I am not much of an extrovert, and I'm not much interested in extroverted objects. I do not care for the 'ideas' of novelists. Novels are wonderful, of course, but I prefer newspapers.
Will Cuppy
Let's not be too quick to blame the human race for everything. A great many species of animals became extinct before man ever appeared on earth.
Will Cuppy
Never call anyone a baboon unless you are sure of your facts.
Will Cuppy
I only know that all is lost, and that nothing can help me unless I inherit money, strike oil or go to work.
Will Cuppy
Orangutans teach us that looks are not everything-but warned near it.
Will Cuppy
A few Cobras in your home will soon clear it of Rats and Mice. Of course, you will still have the Cobras.
Will Cuppy
Ah, well! We live and learn, or, anyway, we live.
Will Cuppy
The Dodo never had a chance. He seems to have been invented for the sole purpose of becoming extinct and that was all he was good for.
Will Cuppy
Borrowing has a bad name, but you would be surprised how it helps in a pinch.
Will Cuppy
To the seeing eye life is mostly Sparrows.
Will Cuppy
During his fifteen years in Italy, Hannibal never had enough elephants to suit him. Most of the original group succumbed to the climate, and he was always begging Carthage for more, but the people at home were stingy. They would ask if he thought they were made of elephants and what had he done with the elephants they sent before.
Will Cuppy
Much still remains to be learned about his sex life because the Hummingbird is quicker than the eye.
Will Cuppy
Most people, it seems, think that Robinson Crusoe when he landed on his Island had nothing to keep him from starvation or anything else. As a matter of fact he had twelve raft loads of supplies that he took off the wrecked ship. He had as much food and furniture as if he had had a delicatessen store and Fifth Avenue outside his hut.
Will Cuppy
[Footnote:] The female of any species is generally regarded as a relatively anabolic organism, more passive than the male, who is relatively katabolic and active. The fact remains that one frequently runs across a rather katabolic female.
Will Cuppy
The Earthworm plows the whole world with his tunnels, drains and aerates the earth… If you ever buy any land, be sure it has plenty of Earthworms toiling and moiling all day so that you can sit down and relax.
Will Cuppy