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Three million alligators were killed in Florida between 1880 and 1900. Goody!

Will Cuppy

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Will Cuppy
Age: 65 †
Born: 1884
Born: August 23
Died: 1949
Died: September 19
Critic
Humorist
Journalist
Literary Critic
Writer
Auburn
Indiana
William Jacob Cuppy
Florida
Killed
Million
Millions
Three
Goody
Alligators
Footnotes

More quotes by Will Cuppy

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[Footnote:] The Dotterel weighs only four ounces. It has long been a scientific riddle how so much wrong-headedness can manage to exist in so small a space. Still, there's the Least Gnatcatcher.
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Aristotle described the Crow as chaste. In some departments of knowledge, Aristotle was too innocent for his own good.
Will Cuppy
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We have no Common Vipers in the United States, but we have worse.
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The Chameleon's face reminded Aristotle of a Baboon. Aristotle wasn't much of a looker himself.
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The Zebra is striped all over so that the Lion can see him and eat him. Some people say he is striped so that the Lion can not see him. These people believe that the stripes of the Zebra simulate the bars of sunlight falling through the tall jungle grasses and that therefore the Zebra is invisible and that the earth is flat.
Will Cuppy
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Borrowing has a bad name, but you would be surprised how it helps in a pinch.
Will Cuppy
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My philosophy of life can be summed up in four words: It can't be helped.
Will Cuppy
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Even as a child back in Indiana, whenever I took a Butterbelly off the hook I used to ask myself, Does this fish think? I would even ask others, Do you suppose this Butterbelly can think? And all I would get in reply was a look. At the age of eighteen, I left the state.
Will Cuppy
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The wren-box problem is becoming more acute each year, for wrens now demand better housing conditions and labor-saving devices.
Will Cuppy
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A few Cobras in your home will soon clear it of Rats and Mice. Of course, you will still have the Cobras.
Will Cuppy
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A hermit is simply a person to whom civilization has failed to adjust itself.
Will Cuppy
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Alexander III of Macedon is known as Alexander the Great because he killed more people of more different kinds than any other man of his time.
Will Cuppy
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I am billed as a humorist, but of course I am a tragedian at heart.
Will Cuppy
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The moral of the story of the Pilgrims is that if you work hard all your life and behave yourself every minute and take no time out for fun you will break practically even, if you can borrow enough money to pay your taxes.
Will Cuppy
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Cæsar might have married her [Cleopatra], but he had a wife at home. There's always something.
Will Cuppy
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To the seeing eye life is mostly Sparrows.
Will Cuppy
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Male penguins are unfaithful up to an advanced age, a phenomenon sometimes attributed to the sea air.
Will Cuppy
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Much still remains to be learned about his sex life because the Hummingbird is quicker than the eye.
Will Cuppy
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The head of a Pike, served at supper, is said to have caused the death from terror of Theodoric the Goth, who imagined the fish's features to be those of Symmachus, a man he had just killed. But for this story, we of today would have no idea what Symmachus looked like.
Will Cuppy
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Aristotle taught that the brain exists merely to cool the blood and is not involved in the process of thinking. This is true only of certain persons.
Will Cuppy