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I borrow to pay my honest debts and not to squander foolishly. What's more, I confine my borrowing to those who can well afford it. I don't go around sponging on widows and orphans unless they have plenty.
Will Cuppy
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Will Cuppy
Age: 65 †
Born: 1884
Born: August 23
Died: 1949
Died: September 19
Critic
Humorist
Journalist
Literary Critic
Writer
Auburn
Indiana
William Jacob Cuppy
Wells
Borrow
Squander
Well
Afford
Foolishly
Plenty
Orphans
Debt
Confine
Pay
Debts
Unless
Widows
Honest
Orphan
Around
Borrowing
More quotes by Will Cuppy
During his fifteen years in Italy, Hannibal never had enough elephants to suit him. Most of the original group succumbed to the climate, and he was always begging Carthage for more, but the people at home were stingy. They would ask if he thought they were made of elephants and what had he done with the elephants they sent before.
Will Cuppy
Alexander III of Macedon is known as Alexander the Great because he killed more people of more different kinds than any other man of his time.
Will Cuppy
Cæsar might have married her [Cleopatra], but he had a wife at home. There's always something.
Will Cuppy
If you annoy the Hog-nosed Snake enough, he will roll over on his back and play dead. If you turn him right-side up, he will roll over to prove that he is dead... While he is playing dead, you can go straight up to him and step on his head or smash him with a big club.
Will Cuppy
My philosophy of life can be summed up in four words: It can't be helped.
Will Cuppy
Orangutans teach us that looks are not everything-but warned near it.
Will Cuppy
Never call anyone a baboon unless you are sure of your facts.
Will Cuppy
It is because of his brain that he [modern man] has risen above the animals. Guess which animals he has risen above.
Will Cuppy
[Footnote:] The female of any species is generally regarded as a relatively anabolic organism, more passive than the male, who is relatively katabolic and active. The fact remains that one frequently runs across a rather katabolic female.
Will Cuppy
Humor springs from rage, hay fever, overdue rent and miscellaneous hell.
Will Cuppy
To the seeing eye life is mostly Sparrows.
Will Cuppy
We have no Common Vipers in the United States, but we have worse.
Will Cuppy
I only know that all is lost, and that nothing can help me unless I inherit money, strike oil or go to work.
Will Cuppy
Borrowing has a bad name, but you would be surprised how it helps in a pinch.
Will Cuppy
Most people, it seems, think that Robinson Crusoe when he landed on his Island had nothing to keep him from starvation or anything else. As a matter of fact he had twelve raft loads of supplies that he took off the wrecked ship. He had as much food and furniture as if he had had a delicatessen store and Fifth Avenue outside his hut.
Will Cuppy
An Ant on a hot stove-lid runs faster than an Ant on a cold one. Who wouldn't?
Will Cuppy
Three million alligators were killed in Florida between 1880 and 1900. Goody!
Will Cuppy
Just when you're beginning to think pretty well of people, you run across somebody who puts sugar on sliced tomatoes.
Will Cuppy
Much still remains to be learned about his sex life because the Hummingbird is quicker than the eye.
Will Cuppy
The wren-box problem is becoming more acute each year, for wrens now demand better housing conditions and labor-saving devices.
Will Cuppy