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I hate when women compare men to dogs. Men are not dogs. Dogs are loyal. I've never found any strange panties in my dog's house.

Wanda Sykes

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Wanda Sykes
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: March 7
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Writer
Portsmouth
Virginia
Wanda Sykes-Hall
Wanda Yvette Sykes
Wanda Yvette Sykes-Hall
Strange
Hate
House
Found
Panties
Women
Loyal
Never
Dogs
Men
Compare
Dog

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If you have a passion for it, then stop wishing and just do it.
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Some black people want to get in touch with their African roots. But then you got some black people that just don't give a damn. You tell them, 'Hey, I just got back from the motherland.' They're like, 'Where'd you go - Detroit? Did you see The Temptations?'
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If something stinks, I say it stinks. But I try to massage it a little and not be as cutting, come behind it with a joke: Hey, I cut you deep, but now let me put a couple of stitches in you.
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I don't like the saying keep your friends close and enemies closer. I want my enemy on a different planet.
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Don't bother me while I'm eating, or when I'm coming out of the crackhouse or something. Just let me get going.
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I have a funny family, but none of them are remotely in show business.
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There's times when I'm really shy, so these roles that I get to play, they're how I would love to really be. And that's why I love doing stand-up, because it gives me the freedom to say what I really want to say. I think that's why it's my favorite thing to do.
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You can't make a woman happy. That's like trying to cure a fatal disease. The goal is to treat the symptoms so you can comfortably live with the illness.
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It's easier to rip somebody to shreds while you're making them laugh.
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When I'm not on T.V. or working on a movie, I'm on the road doing stand-up. That's my roots.
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A woman would pitch a joke. Nothing. Then a guy would pitch it and everybody would laugh.
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We never hid anything from the kids. I feel whole again, I really do. I've told them, 'Mommy's boo-boo is much better now.'
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white criminals commit the biggest crimes.a brother might rob a bank. a white man will rob a pension fund. the brother is going to get ten to fifteen years because he had a gun. the white guy is going to get a congressional hearing because he had a job and a nice suit.
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Some government workers are dedicated and work hard, but most of them are just waiting to retire.
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I enjoy stand-up because it has the biggest reward: instant gratification. You can hear the people laughing.
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In '87, I used to do this awful, awful James Brown impression.
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I don’t understand why people really get upset about something that doesn’t affect them at all.
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I think maybe Rush Limbaugh was the 20th hijacker. But he was just so strung out on Oxycontin he missed his flight. Rush Limbaugh, 'I hope the country fails' - I hope his kidneys fail, how about that? ... He needs a waterboarding, that's what he needs.
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Since when did I become the spokesperson for nappy-headed hos?
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