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I watch Jay. I watch 'Letterman'. I flip back and forth between 'Conan' and 'Letterman', especially the top of the show for those guys.
Wanda Sykes
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Wanda Sykes
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: March 7
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Writer
Portsmouth
Virginia
Wanda Sykes-Hall
Wanda Yvette Sykes
Wanda Yvette Sykes-Hall
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Conan
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More quotes by Wanda Sykes
I was really gifted at being able to construct a joke, but it's like they weren't even memorable, my first jokes, because they were so about nothing.
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I love Costas. He's knows too much, but he's a good guy.
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I knew something was wrong with the economy when the shampoo girl at my salon closed on a six bedroom house.
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I work hard. The staff and crew see how much energy I put into this project, and it makes them step up.
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I watched a lot of comedy growing up.
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I'm finally just relaxed and comfortable with who I am.
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My neighbor, she invited me to an Elvis party. I told her I couldn't come 'cause I'd be too busy making fun of her from behind my blinds.
Wanda Sykes
When I am outside at night by myself every person turns into a pedophile. So I tend to walk a little faster than usual and then I sprint.
Wanda Sykes
I have a well-balanced show. It's 50/50 on men/women, and also African-American/white writers, it's the same thing. I have four African-American writers, and four non-African-American writers.
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I hate when women compare men to dogs. Men are not dogs. Dogs are loyal. I've never found any strange panties in my dog's house.
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You know what, I think maybe it's because men like to fart, and the host wants to be able to sit in his writers' room and just pass gas freely. Me, I'm a lady. I'm dainty. I know to get up and leave the room and go to my office.
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Seriously, I don't need a gun. I'm easily annoyed. I would shoot people in my house that I invited over.
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Yeah, I had top-secret clearance and everything.
Wanda Sykes
There are just so many more laws and rules that apply with marriage that do not come with domestic partnership and also to me it's the commitment.
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white criminals commit the biggest crimes.a brother might rob a bank. a white man will rob a pension fund. the brother is going to get ten to fifteen years because he had a gun. the white guy is going to get a congressional hearing because he had a job and a nice suit.
Wanda Sykes
I'm here today because I refused to be unhappy. I took a chance.
Wanda Sykes
Mostly everything gets worse before it gets better.
Wanda Sykes
To me, political office should be like jury duty. You should just get a notice in the mail one day and say, 'Aw, sh - , I'm secretary of state next month.
Wanda Sykes
Ok so there's no TV shows, no movies going on fine, but I love going on stage and performing stand up so my situation is a little better than someone who's strictly just an actor or actress.
Wanda Sykes
I know every time I fly, I get checked twice: they stop me at security, and then, they get me again at the gate. And last time, it was so bad, they actually made me go through the machine with the luggage.
Wanda Sykes