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I'm going to leave The Wanda Sykes Show and try to get her job because $5 million ain't too bad!
Wanda Sykes
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Wanda Sykes
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: March 7
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Writer
Portsmouth
Virginia
Wanda Sykes-Hall
Wanda Yvette Sykes
Wanda Yvette Sykes-Hall
Trying
Going
Wanda
Million
Leave
Millions
Show
Jobs
Shows
More quotes by Wanda Sykes
I don't like the saying keep your friends close and enemies closer. I want my enemy on a different planet.
Wanda Sykes
I knew something was wrong with the economy when the shampoo girl at my salon closed on a six bedroom house.
Wanda Sykes
You know what, I think maybe it's because men like to fart, and the host wants to be able to sit in his writers' room and just pass gas freely. Me, I'm a lady. I'm dainty. I know to get up and leave the room and go to my office.
Wanda Sykes
I sat down and wrote some jokes and went to the talent show, got up on stage, fell in love with it and never turned back.
Wanda Sykes
I think the worst one [indian mascot] is the Cleveland Indians' Big Chief Wahoo. It's just a red face on a baseball with a big, toothy grin. It's the Sambo of all other offensive mascots. I have never seen a Native American smile that hard before, not even at a casino opening.
Wanda Sykes
Don't bother me while I'm eating, or when I'm coming out of the crackhouse or something. Just let me get going.
Wanda Sykes
But sometimes the women writers will pitch something and I'll hear it, but the men will keep talking.
Wanda Sykes
Women and our right to choose were going to be challenged with Ashcroft around. When Bush appointed Ashcroft, I went out and got me four abortions. I stocked up. The doctor was like, Listen, you're not pregnant. I said, Hey, just shut up and do your job. I'm exercising my right while I can, dammit.
Wanda Sykes
I have a funny family, but none of them are remotely in show business.
Wanda Sykes
It seems like when I first started, people got into comedy because they wanted to be good comedians.
Wanda Sykes
People say, 'Well don't you regret not having kids?' And I go, 'No, not really.' And then if they keep asking, I always say this, 'Well, you know, maybe I'll adopt.' But I don't mean that. It's just something I say to make me sound like a nicer person.
Wanda Sykes
A woman would pitch a joke. Nothing. Then a guy would pitch it and everybody would laugh.
Wanda Sykes
I'm really funny now.
Wanda Sykes
I'm here today because I refused to be unhappy. I took a chance.
Wanda Sykes
But I understand that relationship I understand how the mother-in-law, daughter-in-law relationship has so many conflicts because it's so forced.
Wanda Sykes
Then you had people who wanted to get into comedy just to get a TV deal.
Wanda Sykes
When I am outside at night by myself every person turns into a pedophile. So I tend to walk a little faster than usual and then I sprint.
Wanda Sykes
I felt like I was being attacked, personally attacked - our community was attacked. Now, I gotta get in their face. I'm proud to be a woman. I'm proud to be a black woman. And I'm proud to be gay.
Wanda Sykes
I think it's because my comedy is in your face, and it comes from a place that's real.
Wanda Sykes
I watched a lot of comedy growing up.
Wanda Sykes