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I'm here today because I hated everything else.
Wanda Sykes
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Wanda Sykes
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: March 7
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Writer
Portsmouth
Virginia
Wanda Sykes-Hall
Wanda Yvette Sykes
Wanda Yvette Sykes-Hall
Comedy
Else
Women
Today
Everything
Hated
More quotes by Wanda Sykes
L.A. is nothing but a bunch of driving, and I hate all that damn driving 'cause it interferes with my drinking.
Wanda Sykes
Don't bother me while I'm eating, or when I'm coming out of the crackhouse or something. Just let me get going.
Wanda Sykes
That word sassy - it haunts me. I keep getting the sassy thing.
Wanda Sykes
You know what, I think maybe it's because men like to fart, and the host wants to be able to sit in his writers' room and just pass gas freely. Me, I'm a lady. I'm dainty. I know to get up and leave the room and go to my office.
Wanda Sykes
My worlds collide. When one things happens, it just starts a domino effect - everything else goes on.
Wanda Sykes
I knew something was wrong with the economy when the shampoo girl at my salon closed on a six bedroom house.
Wanda Sykes
In '87, I used to do this awful, awful James Brown impression.
Wanda Sykes
I'm here today because I refused to be unhappy. I took a chance.
Wanda Sykes
I always had one goal, and that was to be a real funny stand-up comic, and that's pretty much what I'm doing. And everything else is kind of like gravy - TV, movies.
Wanda Sykes
Usually, there's nothing being thrown toward the stage or at me. Then I feel pretty good about it.
Wanda Sykes
I don't like doing the same material over and over again. It's not fun.
Wanda Sykes
To me, political office should be like jury duty. You should just get a notice in the mail one day and say, 'Aw, sh - , I'm secretary of state next month.
Wanda Sykes
Rush Limbaugh was the 20th hijacker. I hope his kidneys fail.
Wanda Sykes
Yeah, I had top-secret clearance and everything.
Wanda Sykes
It's not until you develop your own voice, your own persona onstage that you become your own comic, who you really are.
Wanda Sykes
The first time onstage, a light went on. 'OK, this is my thing. I'm comfortable here. This is my thing.'
Wanda Sykes
I watched a lot of comedy growing up.
Wanda Sykes
I'm finally just relaxed and comfortable with who I am.
Wanda Sykes
I don't like the saying keep your friends close and enemies closer. I want my enemy on a different planet.
Wanda Sykes
As soon as you say 'I do,' you'll discover that marriage is like a car. Both of you might be sitting in the front seat, but only one of you is driving. And most marriages are more like a motorcycle than a car. Somebody has to sit in the back, and you have to yell just to be heard.
Wanda Sykes
