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Seriously, I don't need a gun. I'm easily annoyed. I would shoot people in my house that I invited over.
Wanda Sykes
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Wanda Sykes
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: March 7
Comedian
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Writer
Portsmouth
Virginia
Wanda Sykes-Hall
Wanda Yvette Sykes
Wanda Yvette Sykes-Hall
House
Need
Needs
Annoyed
Would
Invited
People
Shoot
Gun
Seriously
Easily
More quotes by Wanda Sykes
We got to stop doing that, ladies. You know, men are dogs. Men are dogs. We got to stop it. Men are not dogs. Uh-uh. Dogs are loyal.
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I'm really funny now.
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Lot Of Strip Clubs in Florida... Good grief... Florida has so many strip clubs, they need to change their state flag to a brass pole.
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Actually, I majored in marketing and I have a bachelor of science.
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I'm proud to be a woman. I'm proud to be a black woman, and I'm proud to be gay.
Wanda Sykes
Some government workers are dedicated and work hard, but most of them are just waiting to retire.
Wanda Sykes
It's easier to rip somebody to shreds while you're making them laugh.
Wanda Sykes
I felt like I was being attacked, personally attacked - our community was attacked. Now, I gotta get in their face. I'm proud to be a woman. I'm proud to be a black woman. And I'm proud to be gay.
Wanda Sykes
Once you start making money, you can be an ass. But I am not an ass. I'm too lazy, that takes a lot of energy.
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All these teenagers tell us how much they want to grow up and then when they do they want to be young again.
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I sat down and wrote some jokes and went to the talent show, got up on stage, fell in love with it and never turned back.
Wanda Sykes
In '87, I used to do this awful, awful James Brown impression.
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It's not until you develop your own voice, your own persona onstage that you become your own comic, who you really are.
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When my parents send me emails the first 3 are blank.
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I know every time I fly, I get checked twice: they stop me at security, and then, they get me again at the gate. And last time, it was so bad, they actually made me go through the machine with the luggage.
Wanda Sykes
Men don't hear women.
Wanda Sykes
My neighbor, she invited me to an Elvis party. I told her I couldn't come 'cause I'd be too busy making fun of her from behind my blinds.
Wanda Sykes
I think the worst one [indian mascot] is the Cleveland Indians' Big Chief Wahoo. It's just a red face on a baseball with a big, toothy grin. It's the Sambo of all other offensive mascots. I have never seen a Native American smile that hard before, not even at a casino opening.
Wanda Sykes
It's hard to get fired from the government. You have to, like, kill people.
Wanda Sykes
If something stinks, I say it stinks. But I try to massage it a little and not be as cutting, come behind it with a joke: Hey, I cut you deep, but now let me put a couple of stitches in you.
Wanda Sykes
