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Let the punishment fit the crime.

W. S. Gilbert

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W. S. Gilbert
Age: 74 †
Born: 1836
Born: November 18
Died: 1911
Died: May 29
Dramatist
Illustrator
Librettist
Playwright
Poet
Screenwriter
Theatrical Director
Writer
London
England
Sir William Schwenck Gilbert
William Schwenck Gilbert
William S. Gilbert
William Schwenk Gilbert
Bab
Bab Gilbert
William Gilbert
Punishment
Fit
Crime

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To sit in solemn silence on a dull, dark dock in a pestilential prison with a life-long lock awaiting the sensation of a short, sharp shock from a cheap and chippy chopper on a big, black block.
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There's fish in the sea, no doubt of it, As good as ever came out of it.
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every Jack He must study the knack If he wants to make sure of his Jill!
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He led his regiment from behind. He found it less exciting.
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There's a fascination frantic in a ruin that's romantic.
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The privilege and pleasure That we treasure beyond measure Is to run on little errands for the Ministers of State.
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I've an irritating chuckle, I've a celebrated sneer, I've an entertaining snigger, I've a fascinating leer To everybody's prejudice I know a thing or two I can tell a woman's age in half a minute--and I do
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Merely corroborative detail, intended to give artistic verisimilitude to an otherwise bald and unconvincing narrative.
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Though I'm anything but clever, I could talk like that forever.
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The happiest hour a sailor sees Is when he's down At an inland town, With his Nancy on his knees, yo ho! And his arm around her waist!
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I am a courtier grave and serious Who is about to kiss your hand: Try to combine a pose imperious With a demeanour nobly bland.
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I always voted at my party's call, and I never thought of thinking for myself at all.
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When a felon s not engaged in his employment, Or maturing his felonious little plans, His capacity for innocent enjoyment Is just as great as any honest mans.
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When Wellington thrashed Bonaparte, As every child can tell, The House of Peers, throughout the war, Did nothing in particular, And did it very well
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A man is but an ass Who fights in a cuirass
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Then a sentimental passion of a vegetable fashion must excite your languid spleen, An attachment a la Plato for a bashful young potato, or a not-too-French French bean!
W. S. Gilbert
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If your master is surly, from getting up early (And tempers are short in the morning), An inopportune joke is enough to provoke Him to give you, at once, a month's warning.
W. S. Gilbert
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It is a glorious thing To be a Pirate King.
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Society has quite forsaken all her wicked courses, Which empties our police courts, and abolishes divorces.
W. S. Gilbert
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Who knows but we may count among our intellectual chickens Like them an Earl of Thackeray and p'raps a Duke of Dickens
W. S. Gilbert