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All bayonets are bad.

W. S. Gilbert

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W. S. Gilbert
Age: 74 †
Born: 1836
Born: November 18
Died: 1911
Died: May 29
Dramatist
Illustrator
Librettist
Playwright
Poet
Screenwriter
Theatrical Director
Writer
London
England
Sir William Schwenck Gilbert
William Schwenck Gilbert
William S. Gilbert
William Schwenk Gilbert
Bab
Bab Gilbert
William Gilbert
Bayonets

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When Wellington thrashed Bonaparte, As every child can tell, The House of Peers, throughout the war, Did nothing in particular, And did it very well
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My object all sublime I shall achieve in time- To let the punishment fit the crime- The punishment fit the crime.
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When every blessed thing you have is made of silver, or of gold, you long for simple pewter.
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If your master is surly, from getting up early (And tempers are short in the morning), An inopportune joke is enough to provoke Him to give you, at once, a month's warning.
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I often think it's comical How Nature always does contrive That every boy and every gal That's born into the world alive Is either a little Liberal Or else a little Conservative!
W. S. Gilbert
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In short, whoever you may be, To this conclusion you'll agree, When every one is somebodee, Then no one's anybody!
W. S. Gilbert
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On my face extended flat I was walloped with a cat For listening at the key-hole of the door.
W. S. Gilbert
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I love my fellow creatures - I do all the good I can - yet everybody says I'm such a disagreeable man!
W. S. Gilbert
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Who knows but we may count among our intellectual chickens Like them an Earl of Thackeray and p'raps a Duke of Dickens
W. S. Gilbert
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When you are lying awake with a dismal headache, and repose is tabooed by anxiety, I conceive you may use any language you choose to indulge in without impropriety.
W. S. Gilbert
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Posterity will know as little of me as I know of posterity.
W. S. Gilbert
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every Jack He must study the knack If he wants to make sure of his Jill!
W. S. Gilbert
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To sit in solemn silence on a dull, dark dock in a pestilential prison with a life-long lock awaiting the sensation of a short, sharp shock from a cheap and chippy chopper on a big, black block.
W. S. Gilbert
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I accept refreshment at any hands, however lowly.
W. S. Gilbert
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Love, unrequited, robs me of my rest: Love, hopeless love, my ardent soul encumbers: Love, nightmare-like, lies heavy on my chest, And weaves itself into my midnight slumbers!
W. S. Gilbert
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Oh! a private buffoon is a light-hearted loon, If you listen to popular rumour From morning to night he's so joyous and bright, And he bubbles with wit and good humour!
W. S. Gilbert
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Spurn not the nobly born with love affected nor treat with virtuous scorn the well connected.
W. S. Gilbert
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Society has quite forsaken all her wicked courses, Which empties our police courts, and abolishes divorces.
W. S. Gilbert
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Merely corroborative detail, intended to give artistic verisimilitude to an otherwise bald and unconvincing narrative.
W. S. Gilbert
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I am a child of Nature, and take after my mother.
W. S. Gilbert