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I am the very model of a modern Major-General, I've information vegetable, animal, and mineral, I know the kings of England, and I quote the fights historical, From Marathon to Waterloo, in order categorical.

W. S. Gilbert

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W. S. Gilbert
Age: 74 †
Born: 1836
Born: November 18
Died: 1911
Died: May 29
Dramatist
Illustrator
Librettist
Playwright
Poet
Screenwriter
Theatrical Director
Writer
London
England
Sir William Schwenck Gilbert
William Schwenck Gilbert
William S. Gilbert
William Schwenk Gilbert
Bab
Bab Gilbert
William Gilbert
Animal
Models
Quote
Fighting
Kings
Fights
Order
England
Marathon
Majority
Vegetables
Categorical
General
Model
Waterloo
Military
Majors
Mineral
Information
Major
Vegetable
Modern
Historical
Minerals

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See how the Fates their gifts allot, For A is happy-B is not. Yet B is worthy, I dare say, Of more prosperity than A.
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The happiest hour a sailor sees Is when he's down At an inland town, With his Nancy on his knees, yo ho! And his arm around her waist!
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It's love that makes the world go round.
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I'm very good at integral and differential calculus, I know the scientific names of beings animalculous In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral, I am the very model of a modern Major-General.
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Then a sentimental passion of a vegetable fashion must excite your languid spleen, An attachment a la Plato for a bashful young potato, or a not-too-French French bean!
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Posterity shall know of me even less than I shall know of posterity.
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Ah, pray no mistake, We are not shy We're very wide awake The Moon and I.
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You must lie upon the daisies and discourse in novel phrases of complicated state of mind. The meaning doesn't matter if it's only idle chatter of a transcendental kind.
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I accept refreshment at any hands, however lowly.
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The Law is the true embodiment of everything that's excellent it has no kind of fault or flaw and I, my Lords, embody the Law.
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Man is nature's sole mistake.
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A popular speaker, however unpopular and insignificant, has only to wind up his speech with half-a-dozen lines of Shakespeare (and to make it clearly understood that they are Shakespeare's) and he will sit down amid thunders of applause.
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Posterity will know as little of me as I know of posterity.
W. S. Gilbert
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Life is a joke that's just begun.
W. S. Gilbert
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It's true I've got no shirts to wear It's true my butcher's bill is due It's true my prospects all look blue - But don't let that unsettle you.
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When Wellington thrashed Bonaparte, As every child can tell, The House of Peers, throughout the war, Did nothing in particular, And did it very well
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The privilege and pleasure That we treasure beyond measure Is to run on little errands for the Ministers of State.
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And that singular anomaly, the lady novelist-- I don't think she'd be missed--I'm sure she'd not be missed!
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I know everybody's income and what everybody earns, And I carefully compare it with the income-tax returns
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When the enterprising burglar isn't burgling When the cut-throat isn't occupied in crime He loves to hear the little brook a-gurgling And listen to the merry village chime.
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