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As is gloriously sung in the Gilbert and Sullivan operetta H.M.S. Pinafore, in the words of W. S. Gilbert: Things are seldom as they seem, Skim milk masquerades as cream.

W. S. Gilbert

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W. S. Gilbert
Age: 74 †
Born: 1836
Born: November 18
Died: 1911
Died: May 29
Dramatist
Illustrator
Librettist
Playwright
Poet
Screenwriter
Theatrical Director
Writer
London
England
Sir William Schwenck Gilbert
William Schwenck Gilbert
William S. Gilbert
William Schwenk Gilbert
Bab
Bab Gilbert
William Gilbert
Cream
Seldom
Masquerades
Milk
Skim
Seem
Gilbert
Words
Sullivan
Seems
Gloriously
Things
Masquerade
Sung

More quotes by W. S. Gilbert

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When the enterprising burglar isn't burgling When the cut-throat isn't occupied in crime He loves to hear the little brook a-gurgling And listen to the merry village chime.
W. S. Gilbert
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No good play is a success fine writing and high morals are useless on the stage. I have been scribbling twaddle for thirty-five years to suit the public taste, and I should know.
W. S. Gilbert
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I am a child of Nature, and take after my mother.
W. S. Gilbert
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I am the Captain of the Pinafore And a right good captain too! . . . . And I'm never, never sick at sea! What, never? No, never! What never? Hardly ever! He's hardly ever sick at sea! Then give three cheers, and one cheer more, For the hardy Captain of the Pinafore!
W. S. Gilbert
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I'm very good at integral and differential calculus, I know the scientific names of beings animalculous In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral, I am the very model of a modern Major-General.
W. S. Gilbert
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If you give me your attention, I will tell you what I am: I'm a genuine philanthropist--all other kinds are sham. Each little fault of temper and each social defect In my erring fellow creatures, I endeavor to correct.
W. S. Gilbert
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On my face extended flat I was walloped with a cat For listening at the key-hole of the door.
W. S. Gilbert
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For duty, duty must be done The rule applies to everyone.
W. S. Gilbert
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And that singular anomaly, the lady novelist-- I don't think she'd be missed--I'm sure she'd not be missed!
W. S. Gilbert
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When every blessed thing you have is made of silver, or of gold, you long for simple pewter.
W. S. Gilbert
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If your master is surly, from getting up early (And tempers are short in the morning), An inopportune joke is enough to provoke Him to give you, at once, a month's warning.
W. S. Gilbert
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When a felon s not engaged in his employment, Or maturing his felonious little plans, His capacity for innocent enjoyment Is just as great as any honest mans.
W. S. Gilbert
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In the discovery of secret things and in the investigation of hidden causes, stronger reasons are obtained from sure experiments and demonstrated arguments than from probable conjectures and the opinions of philosophical speculators of the common sort.
W. S. Gilbert
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Merely corroborative detail, intended to give artistic verisimilitude to an otherwise bald and unconvincing narrative.
W. S. Gilbert
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Oh! a private buffoon is a light-hearted loon, If you listen to popular rumour From morning to night he's so joyous and bright, And he bubbles with wit and good humour!
W. S. Gilbert
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I am a courtier grave and serious Who is about to kiss your hand: Try to combine a pose imperious With a demeanour nobly bland.
W. S. Gilbert
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Utopia's quite another land In her enterprising movements, She is England--with improvements
W. S. Gilbert
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Darwinian man, though well-behaved, at best is only a monkey shaved.
W. S. Gilbert
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To sit in solemn silence on a dull, dark dock in a pestilential prison with a life-long lock awaiting the sensation of a short, sharp shock from a cheap and chippy chopper on a big, black block.
W. S. Gilbert
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You must lie upon the daisies and discourse in novel phrases of complicated state of mind. The meaning doesn't matter if it's only idle chatter of a transcendental kind.
W. S. Gilbert