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I'm very good at integral and differential calculus, I know the scientific names of beings animalculous In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral, I am the very model of a modern Major-General.

W. S. Gilbert

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W. S. Gilbert
Age: 74 †
Born: 1836
Born: November 18
Died: 1911
Died: May 29
Dramatist
Illustrator
Librettist
Playwright
Poet
Screenwriter
Theatrical Director
Writer
London
England
Sir William Schwenck Gilbert
William Schwenck Gilbert
William S. Gilbert
William Schwenk Gilbert
Bab
Bab Gilbert
William Gilbert
Modern
Scientific
Vegetable
Animal
Majors
Minerals
Names
Major
Calculus
Matter
Matters
Integral
Good
Models
Vegetables
General
Mathematical
Beings
Math
Differential
Short
Model
Mineral

More quotes by W. S. Gilbert

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I often think it's comical How Nature always does contrive That every boy and every gal That's born into the world alive Is either a little Liberal Or else a little Conservative!
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Spurn not the nobly born with love affected nor treat with virtuous scorn the well connected.
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On my face extended flat I was walloped with a cat For listening at the key-hole of the door.
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So I fell in love with a rich attorney's Elderly ugly daughter.
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I am a child of Nature, and take after my mother.
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Love, unrequited, robs me of my rest: Love, hopeless love, my ardent soul encumbers: Love, nightmare-like, lies heavy on my chest, And weaves itself into my midnight slumbers!
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Who knows but we may count among our intellectual chickens Like them an Earl of Thackeray and p'raps a Duke of Dickens
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Oh, I am a cook and a captain bold, And the mate of the Nancybrig, And a bos'sun tight, and a midshipmite, And the crew of the captain's gig!
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Oh, wouldn't the world seem dull and flat with nothing whatever to grumble at?
W. S. Gilbert
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A policeman's lot is not a happy one
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Bless your heart, they don't mind--they're exceedingly kind-- They don't blame you--as long as you're funny!
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Life is a joke that's just begun.
W. S. Gilbert
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The idiot who praises, with enthusiastic tone, All centuries but this, and every country but his own.
W. S. Gilbert
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I am the very model of a modern major general
W. S. Gilbert
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I am a courtier grave and serious Who is about to kiss your hand: Try to combine a pose imperious With a demeanour nobly bland.
W. S. Gilbert
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In the discovery of secret things and in the investigation of hidden causes, stronger reasons are obtained from sure experiments and demonstrated arguments than from probable conjectures and the opinions of philosophical speculators of the common sort.
W. S. Gilbert
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I am the Captain of the Pinafore And a right good captain too! . . . . And I'm never, never sick at sea! What, never? No, never! What never? Hardly ever! He's hardly ever sick at sea! Then give three cheers, and one cheer more, For the hardy Captain of the Pinafore!
W. S. Gilbert
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Society has quite forsaken all her wicked courses, Which empties our police courts, and abolishes divorces.
W. S. Gilbert
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Though I'm anything but clever, I could talk like that forever.
W. S. Gilbert
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The privilege and pleasure That we treasure beyond measure Is to run on little errands for the Ministers of State.
W. S. Gilbert