Quote

If it does not work the first time, try, try again. Then quit. No need to be an idiot.

W. C. Fields

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W. C. Fields
Age: 66 †
Born: 1880
Born: January 29
Died: 1946
Died: December 25
Actor
Cabaret Artist
Circus Performer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
WC Fields
William Claude Dukenfield
W.C. Fields
First
Needs
Trying
Quit
Work
Quitting
Time
Idiot
Doe
Firsts
Need

More quotes by W. C. Fields

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Marriage is better than leprosy only because it's easier to get rid of.
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You can fool some of the people some of the time -- and that's enough to make a decent living.
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Drown in a cold vat of whiskey? Death, where is thy sting?
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There comes a time in the affairs of man when he must take the bull by the tail and face the situation.
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Dentists, lawyers, doctors are all a bunch of thieving bastards.
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I like children. If they're properly cooked.
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I like thieves. Some of my best friends are thieves. Why, just last week we had the president of the bank over for dinner.
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The laziest man I ever met put popcorn in his pancakes so they would turn over by themselves.
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Christmas at my house is always at least six or seven times more pleasant than anywhere else. We start drinking early. And while everyone else is seeing only one Santa Claus, we'll be seeing six or seven.
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Take me down to the bar! We'll drink breakfast together!
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How well I remember my first encounter with The Devil'ss Brew. I happened to stumble across a case of bourbon - and went right on stumbling for several days thereafter.
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I don't drink water. Have you seen the way it rusts pipes?
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I never drink water that is the stuff that rusts pipes.
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Anyone who hates children and animals can't be all bad.
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The income tax was devised to give lawyers and certified public accountants business. Few persons can make head, tail, or middle out of it. Einstein admitted he couldn't.
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If a thing is worth having, it's worth cheating for.
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A man who's intoxicated all the time doesn't need sympathy.
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It was a marriage of convenience, as my father had a blister on his big toe and couldn't travel far to find a girl.
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I used to be indecisive, now I'm not so sure.
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When we have lost everything, including hope, life becomes a disgrace, and death a duty.
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