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Comedy is merely tragedy happening to someone else.
W. C. Fields
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W. C. Fields
Age: 66 †
Born: 1880
Born: January 29
Died: 1946
Died: December 25
Actor
Cabaret Artist
Circus Performer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
WC Fields
William Claude Dukenfield
W.C. Fields
Else
Someone
Happenings
Happening
Tragedy
Merely
Comedy
More quotes by W. C. Fields
Marriage is better than leprosy only because it's easier to get rid of.
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Reality is an illusion that occurs due to the lack of alcohol.
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Some weasel took the cork out of my lunch.
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Dentists, lawyers, doctors are all a bunch of thieving bastards.
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Hollywood is the gold cap on a tooth that should have been pulled out years ago.
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I never met a kid I liked.
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A comic should suffer as much over a single line as a man with a hernia would in picking up a heavy barbell.
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What would you do if you were President, and, on the first day of May, the Russian Ambassador presented you with a beautiful cake which emitted a curious ticking noise? Would you plunge it into a pail of water - thus insulting Soviet cuisine in general?
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I'm looking for loopholes.
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Buried my wife the other day. Had to, she died.
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I must have a drink of breakfast.
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All my available funds are completely tied up in cash.
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The first thing any comedian does on getting an unscheduled laugh is to verify the state of his .
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There are only two real ways to get ahead today - sell liquor or drink it.
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I ad lib most of my dialogue. If I did remember my lines, it would be too bad for me.
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Start every day off with a smile and get it over with.
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Drown in a cold vat of whiskey? Death, where is thy sting?
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I believe in tying the marriage knot, as long as it's around the woman's neck
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Here is my best advice on the matter of deductibles: just count off on your fingers all the items that you suspect might be deductible - and then forget them, because they aren't.
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I've been asked if I ever get the DTs. I don't know. It's hard to tell where Hollywood ends and the DTs begin.
W. C. Fields
