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I write my scripts short and they develop on the set, which I have found a far better premise both economically and practically.
W. C. Fields
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W. C. Fields
Age: 66 †
Born: 1880
Born: January 29
Died: 1946
Died: December 25
Actor
Cabaret Artist
Circus Performer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
WC Fields
William Claude Dukenfield
W.C. Fields
Practically
Scripts
Develop
Short
Write
Found
Premise
Better
Economically
Writing
Premises
More quotes by W. C. Fields
There comes a time in the affairs of man when he must take the bull by the tail and face the situation.
W. C. Fields
Scotch needs water like a fish needs a bicycle.
W. C. Fields
I've been drunk only once in my life. But that lasted for twenty-three years.
W. C. Fields
I never drink water that is the stuff that rusts pipes.
W. C. Fields
I like children - fried.
W. C. Fields
All Englishmen talk as if they've got a bushel of plums stuck in their throats, and then after swallowing them get constipated from the pips.
W. C. Fields
I have been in the entertainment business some forty-three years, and I have never said anything detrimental or anything that might be construed as belittling any race or religion. I would be a sucker to do so because you can't insult the customers.
W. C. Fields
I've been barbecued, stewed, screwed, tattooed, and fried by people claiming to be my friends. The human race has gone backward, not forward, since the days we were apes swinging through the trees.
W. C. Fields
Happiness means quiet nerves.
W. C. Fields
Bert Williams was the funniest man I ever saw and the saddest man I ever knew.
W. C. Fields
Wouldn't it be terrible if I quoted some reliable statistics which prove that more people are driven insane through religious hysteria than by drinking alcohol.
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If I had my life to live over again, I'd live over a saloon.
W. C. Fields
Attitude is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than what people do or say. It is more important than appearance, giftedness, or skill.
W. C. Fields
I never met a kid I liked.
W. C. Fields
Business is an establishment that gives you the legal, even though unethical, right to screw the naive-right, left, and in the middle.
W. C. Fields
My main ambition as a gardener is to water my orange trees with gin, then all I have to do is squeeze the juice into a glass.
W. C. Fields
Thou shalt not steal-only from other comedians.
W. C. Fields
I feel like a midget with muddy feet had been walking over my tongue all night.
W. C. Fields
A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her.
W. C. Fields
Back in my rummy days, I would tremble and shake for hours upon arising. It was the only exercise I got.
W. C. Fields
