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I always made up my own acts built them out of my knowledge and observation of real life. I'd had wonderful opportunities to study people and every time I went out on the stage I tried to show the audience some bit of true human nature.

W. C. Fields

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W. C. Fields
Age: 66 †
Born: 1880
Born: January 29
Died: 1946
Died: December 25
Actor
Cabaret Artist
Circus Performer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
WC Fields
William Claude Dukenfield
W.C. Fields
Made
Show
Built
Every
Opportunity
Bits
Always
Shows
Stage
Time
True
Went
Life
Nature
Study
Observation
People
Human
Wonderful
Acts
Humans
Audience
Opportunities
Real
Knowledge
Tried

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Thou shalt not take the name of the Lord thy God in vain unless you've used up all the other four-letter words.
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Don't worry about your heart, it will last you as long as you live.
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There is not a man in America who has not had a secret ambition to boot an infant.
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How well I remember my first encounter with The Devil'ss Brew. I happened to stumble across a case of bourbon - and went right on stumbling for several days thereafter.
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Never eat at a place called 'Moms', but if the only other place in town has a sign that says 'Eats', go back to Moms.
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I seldom took a drink on the set before 9 a.m.
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Drown in a cold vat of whiskey? Death, where is thy sting?
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I only drink to steady my nerves... sometimes I'm so steady I don't move for months.
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I like children - fried.
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Horse sense is the thing a horse has which keeps it from betting on people.
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Bert Williams was the funniest man I ever saw and the saddest man I ever knew.
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Comedy is merely tragedy happening to someone else.
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A man who's intoxicated all the time doesn't need sympathy.
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A merry Christmas to all my friends except two.
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The advantages of whiskey over dogs are legion. Whiskey does not need to be periodically wormed, it does not need to be fed, it never requires a special kennel, it has no toenails to be clipped or coat to be stripped. Whiskey sits quietly in its special nook until you want it. True, whiskey has a nasty habit of running out, but then so does a dog.
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Attitude is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than what people do or say. It is more important than appearance, giftedness, or skill.
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I think of the church often. Not because religion was closing in on me, but because for a long time my ass was sore from that hard, unupholstered pew.
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Was I in here last night and did I spend a $20 bill? Oh, thank goodness... I thought I'd lost it.
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Where there is a will, there's prosperity around the corner.
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Always carry a flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite, and furthermore always carry a small snake.
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