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A comic should suffer as much over a single line as a man with a hernia would in picking up a heavy barbell.
W. C. Fields
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W. C. Fields
Age: 66 †
Born: 1880
Born: January 29
Died: 1946
Died: December 25
Actor
Cabaret Artist
Circus Performer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
WC Fields
William Claude Dukenfield
W.C. Fields
Men
Suffer
Heavy
Line
Single
Barbell
Lines
Hernia
Suffering
Hernias
Much
Picking
Would
Comic
More quotes by W. C. Fields
I never voted for anybody. I always voted against.
W. C. Fields
Remember, a dead fish can float downstream, but it takes a live one to swim upstream.
W. C. Fields
Ah, the patter of little feet around the house. There's nothing like having a midget for a butler.
W. C. Fields
After two days in the hospital, I turn to the nurse.
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Say anything that you like about me except that I drink water.
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It is impossible to find twelve fair men in all the world.
W. C. Fields
Oh, insomnia! Ah, well, I know a good cure for it... Get plenty of sleep.
W. C. Fields
I don't drink water. Have you seen the way it rusts pipes?
W. C. Fields
No doubt exists that all women are crazy it's only a question of degree.
W. C. Fields
Children should neither be seen or heard from - ever again.
W. C. Fields
When you wake up in the morning, smile - and get it over with.
W. C. Fields
I believe in tying the marriage knot, as long as it's around the woman's neck
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No man is boss in his own home, but he can make up for it, he thinks, by making a dog play dead.
W. C. Fields
If I had to live my life over, I'd live over a saloon.
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I'd take a Bromo, but I can't stand the noise.
W. C. Fields
Never try to impress a woman, because if you do she'll expect you to keep up the standard for the rest of your life.
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I once spent a year in Philadelphia, I think it was on a Sunday.
W. C. Fields
Dentists, lawyers, doctors are all a bunch of thieving bastards.
W. C. Fields
The world is getting to be such a dangerous place, a man is lucky to get out of it alive.
W. C. Fields
Money will not buy happiness, but it will let you be unhappy in nice places.
W. C. Fields
