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I seldom took a drink on the set before 9 a.m.

W. C. Fields

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W. C. Fields
Age: 66 †
Born: 1880
Born: January 29
Died: 1946
Died: December 25
Actor
Cabaret Artist
Circus Performer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
WC Fields
William Claude Dukenfield
W.C. Fields
Drink
Seldom
Took

More quotes by W. C. Fields

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Dentists, lawyers, doctors are all a bunch of thieving bastards.
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A thing worth having is a thing worth cheating for.
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I've been on a 46-year diet of olives and alcohol. The latter I consume. The former I save and use over again in more alcohol. In my lifetime, I imagine, I have consumed at least $200,000 worth of whisky.
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When we have lost everything, including hope, life becomes a disgrace, and death a duty.
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I never drank anything stronger than beer before I was twelve.
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Show me a great actor and I'll show you a lousy husband. Show me a great actress, and you've seen the devil.
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I always made up my own acts built them out of my knowledge and observation of real life. I'd had wonderful opportunities to study people and every time I went out on the stage I tried to show the audience some bit of true human nature.
W. C. Fields
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Never mind what I told you - you do as I tell you.
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Now don't say you can't swear off drinking it's easy. I've done it a thousand times.
W. C. Fields
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I'm searching for loopholes.
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Bert Williams was the funniest man I ever saw and the saddest man I ever knew.
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Ain't fit for man nor beast
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I've been asked if I ever get the DTs. I don't know. It's hard to tell where Hollywood ends and the DTs begin.
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It's what you do that counts and not what you say therefore I fired my press agent.
W. C. Fields
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Wouldn't it be terrible if I quoted some reliable statistics which prove that more people are driven insane through religious hysteria than by drinking alcohol.
W. C. Fields
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I personally stay away from natural foods. At my age I need all the preservatives I can get.
W. C. Fields
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Indeed, moderation is my middle name (though I do not often use it in signing legal documents)
W. C. Fields
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I could juggle anything in my day. Balls, cigar boxes, knives...But there was one thing I could never juggle. My income tax.
W. C. Fields
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I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it.
W. C. Fields
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I like thieves. Some of my best friends are thieves. Why, just last week we had the president of the bank over for dinner.
W. C. Fields