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Try till you succeed...if you don't succeed once, then destroy all evidence of the fact that you tried!
W. C. Fields
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W. C. Fields
Age: 66 †
Born: 1880
Born: January 29
Died: 1946
Died: December 25
Actor
Cabaret Artist
Circus Performer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
WC Fields
William Claude Dukenfield
W.C. Fields
Till
Destroy
Tried
Evidence
Succeed
Fact
Facts
Trying
More quotes by W. C. Fields
Sleep! The most beautiful experience in life. Except drink.
W. C. Fields
I never eat before breakfast.
W. C. Fields
I was in love with a beautiful blonde once. She drove me to drink. That's the one thing I'm indebted to her for.
W. C. Fields
I don't have to attend every argument I'm invited to.
W. C. Fields
My daughter wants to throw a stone at a bad man. I stop her from throwing, shaking my head and giving her a little slap. My disapproval is complete. You think: 'That's right, she shouldn't throw a stone even at a villain.' Then I hand her a brick to throw.
W. C. Fields
Yes I do like children ... Girl children...about eighteen or twenty.
W. C. Fields
I like my films to influence the audience. Even if it means tripping their aged grandparents with a cane when they get home.
W. C. Fields
The only thing a lawyer won't question is the legitimacy of his mother.
W. C. Fields
Ye Gads, no! I couldn't stand the noise.
W. C. Fields
No one likes the fellow who is all rogue, but we'll forgive him almost anything if there is warmth of human sympathy underneath his rogueries. The immortal types of comedy are just such men.
W. C. Fields
It's morally wrong to allow a sucker to keep his money.
W. C. Fields
I can do anything I want to do!
W. C. Fields
Remember, Lady Godiva put all she had on a horse and she lost her shirt!
W. C. Fields
Here is my best advice on the matter of deductibles: just count off on your fingers all the items that you suspect might be deductible - and then forget them, because they aren't.
W. C. Fields
It ain't what they call you, it's what you answer to.
W. C. Fields
Never work with animals or children.
W. C. Fields
In every big city there is always one surefire laugh, and that lies in hanging some piece of idiocy upon the people of a nearby city or town.
W. C. Fields
The movie people would have nothing to do with me until they heard me speak in a Broadway play, then they all wanted to sign me for the silent movies.
W. C. Fields
It is impossible to find twelve fair men in all the world.
W. C. Fields
Fields' reply: He'd think I was a sissy.
W. C. Fields
