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Where there is a will, there's prosperity around the corner.
W. C. Fields
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W. C. Fields
Age: 66 †
Born: 1880
Born: January 29
Died: 1946
Died: December 25
Actor
Cabaret Artist
Circus Performer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
WC Fields
William Claude Dukenfield
W.C. Fields
Corner
Corners
Prosperity
Money
Around
More quotes by W. C. Fields
Money will not buy happiness, but it will let you be unhappy in nice places.
W. C. Fields
I've been on a 46-year diet of olives and alcohol. The latter I consume. The former I save and use over again in more alcohol. In my lifetime, I imagine, I have consumed at least $200,000 worth of whisky.
W. C. Fields
Thou shalt not kill anything less than a fifth.
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The work I'm doing on the screen differs from that of anyone else. My comedy is of a peculiar nature...no writers have been developed along the lines of my type of comedy and this is why I sometimes have differences with writers, supervisors and directors alike.
W. C. Fields
Happiness means quiet nerves.
W. C. Fields
I like children. If they're properly cooked.
W. C. Fields
First prize was a week in Philadelphia. Second prize was two weeks.
W. C. Fields
Dentists, lawyers, doctors are all a bunch of thieving bastards.
W. C. Fields
Children should neither be seen or heard from - ever again.
W. C. Fields
I never drink water that is the stuff that rusts pipes.
W. C. Fields
Women are like elephants to me. I like to look at them, but I wouldn't want to own one.
W. C. Fields
My daughter wants to throw a stone at a bad man. I stop her from throwing, shaking my head and giving her a little slap. My disapproval is complete. You think: 'That's right, she shouldn't throw a stone even at a villain.' Then I hand her a brick to throw.
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It's what you do that counts and not what you say therefore I fired my press agent.
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How well I remember my first encounter with The Devil'ss Brew. I happened to stumble across a case of bourbon - and went right on stumbling for several days thereafter.
W. C. Fields
I drink therefore I am.
W. C. Fields
I always keep a supply of stimulant handy in case I see a snake, which I also keep handy.
W. C. Fields
All the men in my family were bearded, and most of the women.
W. C. Fields
No doubt exists that all women are crazy it's only a question of degree.
W. C. Fields
The movie people would have nothing to do with me until they heard me speak in a Broadway play, then they all wanted to sign me for the silent movies.
W. C. Fields
There are only two real ways to get ahead today - sell liquor or drink it.
W. C. Fields
