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Where there is a will, there's prosperity around the corner.

W. C. Fields

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W. C. Fields
Age: 66 †
Born: 1880
Born: January 29
Died: 1946
Died: December 25
Actor
Cabaret Artist
Circus Performer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
WC Fields
William Claude Dukenfield
W.C. Fields
Corner
Corners
Prosperity
Money
Around

More quotes by W. C. Fields

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Oh, insomnia! Ah, well, I know a good cure for it... Get plenty of sleep.
W. C. Fields
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I would rather be living in Philadelphia.
W. C. Fields
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I always made up my own acts built them out of my knowledge and observation of real life. I'd had wonderful opportunities to study people and every time I went out on the stage I tried to show the audience some bit of true human nature.
W. C. Fields
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You can fool some of the people some of the time -- and that's enough to make a decent living.
W. C. Fields
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When life hands you lemons, make whisky sours.
W. C. Fields
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Was I in here last night and did I spend a $20 bill? Oh, thank goodness... I thought I'd lost it.
W. C. Fields
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I have been advised by the best medical authority, at my age, not to attempt to give up alcohol.
W. C. Fields
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The clever cat eats cheese and breathes down rat holes with baited breath.
W. C. Fields
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I have a poor memory for names but I seldom remember a face.
W. C. Fields
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My main ambition as a gardener is to water my orange trees with gin, then all I have to do is squeeze the juice into a glass.
W. C. Fields
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Try till you succeed...if you don't succeed once, then destroy all evidence of the fact that you tried!
W. C. Fields
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The income tax was devised to give lawyers and certified public accountants business. Few persons can make head, tail, or middle out of it. Einstein admitted he couldn't.
W. C. Fields
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Drown in a cold vat of whiskey? Death, where is thy sting?
W. C. Fields
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Yes I do like children ... Girl children...about eighteen or twenty.
W. C. Fields
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I like thieves. Some of my best friends are thieves. Why, just last week we had the president of the bank over for dinner.
W. C. Fields
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Abstaining is favorable both to the head and the pocket.
W. C. Fields
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Here is my best advice on the matter of deductibles: just count off on your fingers all the items that you suspect might be deductible - and then forget them, because they aren't.
W. C. Fields
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I only drink to steady my nerves... sometimes I'm so steady I don't move for months.
W. C. Fields
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Comedy is merely tragedy happening to someone else.
W. C. Fields
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Never try to impress a woman, because if you do she'll expect you to keep up the standard for the rest of your life.
W. C. Fields