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Bert Williams was the funniest man I ever saw and the saddest man I ever knew.
W. C. Fields
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W. C. Fields
Age: 66 †
Born: 1880
Born: January 29
Died: 1946
Died: December 25
Actor
Cabaret Artist
Circus Performer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
WC Fields
William Claude Dukenfield
W.C. Fields
Funniest
Williams
Saddest
Saws
Knew
Ever
Men
Bert
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The best thing to break is a contract.
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During one of my treks through Afghanistan, we lost our corkscrew. We were compelled to live on food and water for several days.
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All things considered, I'd rather be in Philadelphia
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The laziest man I ever met put popcorn in his pancakes so they would turn over by themselves.
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Beer: Helping ugly people have sex since 3000 B. C.
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Sleep! The most beautiful experience in life. Except drink.
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Anyone who hates children and animals can't be all bad.
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I would rather be living in Philadelphia.
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Abstaining is favorable both to the head and the pocket.
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A man who overindulges lives in a dream. He becomes conceited. He thinks the whole world revolves around him and it usually does.
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W. C. Fields, a lifetime agnostic, was discovered reading a Bible on his deathbed. ''I'm looking for a loop-hole,'' he explained.
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It was a marriage of convenience, as my father had a blister on his big toe and couldn't travel far to find a girl.
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I never drink water that is the stuff that rusts pipes.
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When doctors and undertakers meet, they wink at each other.
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Thou shalt not take the name of the Lord thy God in vain unless you've used up all the other four-letter words.
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A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money.
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Philadelphia, wonderful town, spent a week there one night
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