Quote

I have a poor memory for names but I seldom remember a face.

W. C. Fields

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

W. C. Fields
Age: 66 †
Born: 1880
Born: January 29
Died: 1946
Died: December 25
Actor
Cabaret Artist
Circus Performer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
WC Fields
William Claude Dukenfield
W.C. Fields
Faces
Funny
Seldom
Remember
Humorous
Memory
Memories
Names
Face
Poor

More quotes by W. C. Fields

Image
Just like my Uncle Charlie used to say, just before he sprung the trap: He said, You can't cheat and honest man! Never give a sucker an even break or smarten up a chump!
W. C. Fields
Image
There's no such thing as a tough child - if you parboil them first for seven hours, they always come out tender.
W. C. Fields
Image
I have been advised by the best medical authority, at my age, not to attempt to give up alcohol.
W. C. Fields
Image
The nation needs to return to the colonial way of life, when a wife was judged by the amount of wood she could split.
W. C. Fields
Image
I don't drink anymore, on the other hand I don't drink any less either.
W. C. Fields
Image
Here is my best advice on the matter of deductibles: just count off on your fingers all the items that you suspect might be deductible - and then forget them, because they aren't.
W. C. Fields
Image
How is the human race going to survive now that the cost of living has gone up two dollars a quart?
W. C. Fields
Image
Alcoholic: anybody who drinks more than I do.
W. C. Fields
Image
I always keep a supply of stimulant handy in case I see a snake, which I also keep handy.
W. C. Fields
Image
Some weasel took the cork out of my lunch.
W. C. Fields
Image
The funniest thing a comedian can do is not do it.
W. C. Fields
Image
There is not a man in America who has not had a secret ambition to boot an infant.
W. C. Fields
Image
What would you do if you were President, and, on the first day of May, the Russian Ambassador presented you with a beautiful cake which emitted a curious ticking noise? Would you plunge it into a pail of water - thus insulting Soviet cuisine in general?
W. C. Fields
Image
Oh, insomnia! Ah, well, I know a good cure for it... Get plenty of sleep.
W. C. Fields
Image
Some things are better than sex, and some are worse, but there's nothing exactly like it.
W. C. Fields
Image
I was married once--in San Francisco. I haven't seen her for many years. The great earthquake and fire in 1906 destroyed the marriage certificate. There's no legal proof. Which proves that earthquakes aren't all bad.
W. C. Fields
Image
When you wake up in the morning, smile - and get it over with.
W. C. Fields
Image
It is well to remember that there are five reasons for drinking: the arrival of a friend, one's present or future thirst, the excellence of the cognac, or any other reason
W. C. Fields
Image
Never cry over spilt milk, because it may have been poisoned.
W. C. Fields
Image
I am an expert of electricity. My father occupied the chair of applied electricity at the state prison.
W. C. Fields