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I never voted for anybody. I always voted against.

W. C. Fields

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W. C. Fields
Age: 66 †
Born: 1880
Born: January 29
Died: 1946
Died: December 25
Actor
Cabaret Artist
Circus Performer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
WC Fields
William Claude Dukenfield
W.C. Fields
Always
Never
Voted
Anybody

More quotes by W. C. Fields

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The movie people would have nothing to do with me until they heard me speak in a Broadway play, then they all wanted to sign me for the silent movies.
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Alcoholic: anybody who drinks more than I do.
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It is well to remember that there are five reasons for drinking: the arrival of a friend, one's present or future thirst, the excellence of the cognac, or any other reason
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It ain't what they call you, it's what you answer to.
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When doctors and undertakers meet, they wink at each other.
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Ain't fit for man nor beast
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If I ever found a church that didn't believe in knocking all the other churches, I might consider joining it.
W. C. Fields
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I like children. If they're properly cooked.
W. C. Fields
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I think of the church often. Not because religion was closing in on me, but because for a long time my ass was sore from that hard, unupholstered pew.
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There's no such thing as a tough child - if you parboil them first for seven hours, they always come out tender.
W. C. Fields
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No doubt exists that all women are crazy it's only a question of degree.
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Prayers never bring anything... They may bring solace to the sap, the bigot, the ignorant, the aboriginal, and the lazy - but to the enlightened it is the same as asking Santa Claus to bring you something for Xmas
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I like children - fried.
W. C. Fields
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I am an expert of electricity. My father occupied the chair of applied electricity at the state prison.
W. C. Fields
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Horse sense is the thing a horse has which keeps it from betting on people.
W. C. Fields
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I can do anything I want to do!
W. C. Fields
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Marry an outdoors woman. Then if you throw her out into the yard on a cold night, she can still survive.
W. C. Fields
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Fields' reply: He'd think I was a sissy.
W. C. Fields
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Women are like elephants to me. I like to look at them, but I wouldn't want to own one.
W. C. Fields
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My illness is due to my doctor's insistence that I drink milk, a whitish fluid they force down helpless babies.
W. C. Fields