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Comedy is a serious business. A serious business with only one purpose--to make people laugh.
W. C. Fields
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W. C. Fields
Age: 66 †
Born: 1880
Born: January 29
Died: 1946
Died: December 25
Actor
Cabaret Artist
Circus Performer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
WC Fields
William Claude Dukenfield
W.C. Fields
Business
Make
People
Laugh
Laughing
Serious
Comedy
Purpose
More quotes by W. C. Fields
Show me a great actor and I'll show you a lousy husband. Show me a great actress, and you've seen the devil.
W. C. Fields
I never drank anything stronger than beer before I was twelve.
W. C. Fields
Try till you succeed...if you don't succeed once, then destroy all evidence of the fact that you tried!
W. C. Fields
I'm looking for loopholes. (Said when caught reading the Bible.).
W. C. Fields
Indeed, moderation is my middle name (though I do not often use it in signing legal documents)
W. C. Fields
I've never hit a woman in my life. Not even my own mother.
W. C. Fields
I exercise strong self control. I never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast.
W. C. Fields
Just like my Uncle Charlie used to say, just before he sprung the trap: He said, You can't cheat and honest man! Never give a sucker an even break or smarten up a chump!
W. C. Fields
It is well to remember that there are five reasons for drinking: the arrival of a friend, one's present or future thirst, the excellence of the cognac, or any other reason
W. C. Fields
I don't drink anymore, on the other hand I don't drink any less either.
W. C. Fields
I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it.
W. C. Fields
I never worry about being driven to drink I just worry about being driven home.
W. C. Fields
First prize was a week in Philadelphia. Second prize was two weeks.
W. C. Fields
I like thieves. Some of my best friends are thieves. Why, just last week we had the president of the bank over for dinner.
W. C. Fields
I never smoked a cigar in my life until I was nine
W. C. Fields
I feel like a midget with muddy feet had been walking over my tongue all night.
W. C. Fields
Attitude is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than what people do or say. It is more important than appearance, giftedness, or skill.
W. C. Fields
Fields' reply: He'd think I was a sissy.
W. C. Fields
Some weasel took the cork out of my lunch.
W. C. Fields
Few things in life are more embarrassing than the necessity of having to inform an old friend that you have just got engaged to his fiancee.
W. C. Fields
