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First prize was a week in Philadelphia. Second prize was two weeks.
W. C. Fields
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W. C. Fields
Age: 66 †
Born: 1880
Born: January 29
Died: 1946
Died: December 25
Actor
Cabaret Artist
Circus Performer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
WC Fields
William Claude Dukenfield
W.C. Fields
First
Philadelphia
Prize
Weeks
Second
Week
Two
Firsts
More quotes by W. C. Fields
I don't drink water. Have you seen the way it rusts pipes?
W. C. Fields
You can fool some of the people some of the time -- and that's enough to make a decent living.
W. C. Fields
Thou shalt not steal-only from other comedians.
W. C. Fields
All my available funds are completely tied up in cash.
W. C. Fields
I like thieves. Some of my best friends are thieves. Why, just last week we had the president of the bank over for dinner.
W. C. Fields
I've been asked if I ever get the DTs. I don't know. It's hard to tell where Hollywood ends and the DTs begin.
W. C. Fields
Drown in a cold vat of whiskey? Death, where is thy sting?
W. C. Fields
Try till you succeed...if you don't succeed once, then destroy all evidence of the fact that you tried!
W. C. Fields
I like children - fried.
W. C. Fields
It ain't what they call you, it's what you answer to.
W. C. Fields
Never work with animals or children.
W. C. Fields
I have been advised by the best medical authority, at my age, not to attempt to give up alcohol.
W. C. Fields
I am an expert of electricity. My father occupied the chair of applied electricity at the state prison.
W. C. Fields
I feel like a midget with muddy feet had been walking over my tongue all night.
W. C. Fields
I never drink water. I'm afraid it will become habit-forming.
W. C. Fields
My daughter wants to throw a stone at a bad man. I stop her from throwing, shaking my head and giving her a little slap. My disapproval is complete. You think: 'That's right, she shouldn't throw a stone even at a villain.' Then I hand her a brick to throw.
W. C. Fields
I never drink water that is the stuff that rusts pipes.
W. C. Fields
Remember, a dead fish can float downstream, but it takes a live one to swim upstream.
W. C. Fields
The only thing a lawyer won't question is the legitimacy of his mother.
W. C. Fields
Happiness means quiet nerves.
W. C. Fields
