Quote

Few things in life are more embarrassing than the necessity of having to inform an old friend that you have just got engaged to his fiancee.

W. C. Fields

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W. C. Fields
Age: 66 †
Born: 1880
Born: January 29
Died: 1946
Died: December 25
Actor
Cabaret Artist
Circus Performer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
WC Fields
William Claude Dukenfield
W.C. Fields
Marriage
Friend
Things
Life
Fiancee
Inform
Embarrassing
Necessity
Engaged

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There comes a time in the affairs of man when he must take the bull by the tail and face the situation.
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I only drink to steady my nerves... sometimes I'm so steady I don't move for months.
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Don't worry about your heart, it will last you as long as you live.
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I would rather be living in Philadelphia.
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I could juggle anything in my day. Balls, cigar boxes, knives...But there was one thing I could never juggle. My income tax.
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During one of my treks through Afghanistan, we lost our corkscrew. We were compelled to live on food and water for several days.
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To me, these biblical stories are just so many fish stories, and I'm not specifically referring to Jonah and the whale. I need indisputable proof of anything I'm asked to believe.
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Back in my rummy days, I would tremble and shake for hours upon arising. It was the only exercise I got.
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I don't believe in dining on an empty stomach.
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I never drink water... fish f**k in it.
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I'd take a Bromo, but I can't stand the noise.
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I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.
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Indeed, moderation is my middle name (though I do not often use it in signing legal documents)
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I write my scripts short and they develop on the set, which I have found a far better premise both economically and practically.
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I have spent a lot of time searching through the Bible for loopholes.
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I never drink water. I'm afraid it will become habit-forming.
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I ad lib most of my dialogue. If I did remember my lines, it would be too bad for me.
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Abstaining is favorable both to the head and the pocket.
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I'd rather have two girls at 21 each than one girl at 42.
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First prize was a week in Philadelphia. Second prize was two weeks.
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