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There is not a man in America who has not had a secret ambition to boot an infant.
W. C. Fields
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W. C. Fields
Age: 66 †
Born: 1880
Born: January 29
Died: 1946
Died: December 25
Actor
Cabaret Artist
Circus Performer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
WC Fields
William Claude Dukenfield
W.C. Fields
Boot
Infant
Boots
Ambition
Secret
America
Men
More quotes by W. C. Fields
I feel like a midget with muddy feet had been walking over my tongue all night.
W. C. Fields
I write my scripts short and they develop on the set, which I have found a far better premise both economically and practically.
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I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.
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I've been drunk only once in my life. But that lasted for twenty-three years.
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Buried my wife the other day. Had to, she died.
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It's quite true I'm not drinking anymore however, I'm not drinking any less either.
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If there's a will, prosperity can't be far behind.
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When we have lost everything, including hope, life becomes a disgrace, and death a duty.
W. C. Fields
Children should neither be seen or heard from - ever again.
W. C. Fields
Don't worry about your heart, it will last you as long as you live.
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I must have a drink of breakfast.
W. C. Fields
Somebody's been putting pineapple juice in my pineapple juice!
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I always keep a supply of stimulant handy in case I see a snake, which I also keep handy.
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Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's house unless they have a well-stocked bar.
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Bert Williams was the funniest man I ever saw and the saddest man I ever knew.
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Happiness means quiet nerves.
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The first thing any comedian does on getting an unscheduled laugh is to verify the state of his .
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It is well to remember that there are five reasons for drinking: the arrival of a friend, one's present or future thirst, the excellence of the cognac, or any other reason
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Oh, insomnia! Ah, well, I know a good cure for it... Get plenty of sleep.
W. C. Fields
Never cry over spilt milk, because it may have been poisoned.
W. C. Fields
