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Thou shalt not take the name of the Lord thy God in vain unless you've used up all the other four-letter words.
W. C. Fields
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W. C. Fields
Age: 66 †
Born: 1880
Born: January 29
Died: 1946
Died: December 25
Actor
Cabaret Artist
Circus Performer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
WC Fields
William Claude Dukenfield
W.C. Fields
Lord
Letter
Words
Vain
Used
Thou
Take
Letters
Unless
Name
Names
Four
Shalt
More quotes by W. C. Fields
Money will not buy happiness, but it will let you be unhappy in nice places.
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Now don't say you can't swear off drinking it's easy. I've done it a thousand times.
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Oh, insomnia! Ah, well, I know a good cure for it... Get plenty of sleep.
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Always carry a flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite, and furthermore always carry a small snake.
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First prize was a week in Philadelphia. Second prize was two weeks.
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I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.
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The clever cat eats cheese and breathes down rat holes with baited breath.
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I have been in the entertainment business some forty-three years, and I have never said anything detrimental or anything that might be construed as belittling any race or religion. I would be a sucker to do so because you can't insult the customers.
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I never worry about being driven to drink I just worry about being driven home.
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When life hands you lemons, make whisky sours.
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I'm looking for loopholes.
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A man who's intoxicated all the time doesn't need sympathy.
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The best thing to break is a contract.
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I think of the church often. Not because religion was closing in on me, but because for a long time my ass was sore from that hard, unupholstered pew.
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You can't trust water: Even a straight stick turns crooked in it.
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Philadelphia, wonderful town, spent a week there one night
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Remember, a dead fish can float downstream, but it takes a live one to swim upstream.
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I always made up my own acts built them out of my knowledge and observation of real life. I'd had wonderful opportunities to study people and every time I went out on the stage I tried to show the audience some bit of true human nature.
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Some people are born losers others acquire the knack gradually.
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Remember, Lady Godiva put all she had on a horse and she lost her shirt!
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