Quote

There are seven natural openings in the head and body. A lawyer is the only human being with eight. The extra one is a slot to store money in, should his bank be unable to hold all of it.

W. C. Fields

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W. C. Fields
Age: 66 †
Born: 1880
Born: January 29
Died: 1946
Died: December 25
Actor
Cabaret Artist
Circus Performer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
WC Fields
William Claude Dukenfield
W.C. Fields
Humans
Eight
Unable
Seven
Extra
Hold
Extras
Head
Bank
Natural
Store
Money
Stores
Body
Lawyer
Slot
Human
Opening
Openings

More quotes by W. C. Fields

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I never smoked a cigar in my life until I was nine
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If there's a will, prosperity can't be far behind.
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Trust everybody, but cut the cards yourself.
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The income tax was devised to give lawyers and certified public accountants business. Few persons can make head, tail, or middle out of it. Einstein admitted he couldn't.
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It was a marriage of convenience, as my father had a blister on his big toe and couldn't travel far to find a girl.
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I exercise strong self control. I never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast.
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Smile first thing in the morning. Get it over with.
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Don't worry about your heart, it will last you as long as you live.
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Say anything that you like about me except that I drink water.
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Never mind what I told you - you do as I tell you.
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Indeed, moderation is my middle name (though I do not often use it in signing legal documents)
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I drink with impunity...or anyone else who invites me.
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No doubt exists that all women are crazy it's only a question of degree.
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I don't drink water. Have you seen the way it rusts pipes?
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It is well to remember that there are five reasons for drinking: the arrival of a friend, one's present or future thirst, the excellence of the cognac, or any other reason
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Some things are better than sex, and some are worse, but there's nothing exactly like it.
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In the ten years since I had run away from home...I had gone through more strange experiences than the average person crowds into a whole lifetime.
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Christmas at my house is always at least six or seven times more pleasant than anywhere else. We start drinking early. And while everyone else is seeing only one Santa Claus, we'll be seeing six or seven.
W. C. Fields
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Philadelphia, wonderful town, spent a week there one night
W. C. Fields
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The work I'm doing on the screen differs from that of anyone else. My comedy is of a peculiar nature...no writers have been developed along the lines of my type of comedy and this is why I sometimes have differences with writers, supervisors and directors alike.
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