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The best thing to break is a contract.

W. C. Fields

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W. C. Fields
Age: 66 †
Born: 1880
Born: January 29
Died: 1946
Died: December 25
Actor
Cabaret Artist
Circus Performer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
WC Fields
William Claude Dukenfield
W.C. Fields
Thing
Contract
Contracts
Break
Best

More quotes by W. C. Fields

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I spent half my money on gambling, alcohol and wild women. The other half I wasted.
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If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bull.
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First prize was a week in Philadelphia. Second prize was two weeks.
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If I had my life to live over again, I'd live over a saloon.
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I never drink water. I'm afraid it will become habit-forming.
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It's what you do that counts and not what you say therefore I fired my press agent.
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I could be stranded in any town in the United States with ten cents and within an hour make $20 with the shell game.
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Some people are born losers others acquire the knack gradually.
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Where there is a will, there's prosperity around the corner.
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Say anything that you like about me except that I drink water.
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Everybody's got to believe in something. I believe I'll have another beer.
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It is impossible to find twelve fair men in all the world.
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Few things in life are more embarrassing than the necessity of having to inform an old friend that you have just got engaged to his fiancee.
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Buried my wife the other day. Had to, she died.
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I like my films to influence the audience. Even if it means tripping their aged grandparents with a cane when they get home.
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I didn't squawk about the steak, dear. I merely said I didn't see that old horse that used to be tethered outside here.
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I'm free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally.
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Variant: I was driven to drink by a woman. I am forever grateful, yet I never had the good manners to thank her.
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No man is boss in his own home, but he can make up for it, he thinks, by making a dog play dead.
W. C. Fields
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A thing worth having is a thing worth cheating for.
W. C. Fields