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I didn't squawk about the steak, dear. I merely said I didn't see that old horse that used to be tethered outside here.
W. C. Fields
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W. C. Fields
Age: 66 †
Born: 1880
Born: January 29
Died: 1946
Died: December 25
Actor
Cabaret Artist
Circus Performer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
WC Fields
William Claude Dukenfield
W.C. Fields
Horse
Outside
Didn
Used
Tethered
Steak
Dear
Merely
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A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her.
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I feel like a midget with muddy feet had been walking over my tongue all night.
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I didn't say the meat was tough. I said I didn't see the horse that is usually outside.
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I always keep a supply of stimulant handy in case I see a snake, which I also keep handy.
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I personally stay away from natural foods. At my age I need all the preservatives I can get.
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Ye Gads, no! I couldn't stand the noise.
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Reminds me of my safari in Africa. Somebody forgot the corkscrew and for several days we had to live on nothing but food and water.
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It's a wonderful thing, the D.T.'s. You can travel the world in a couple of hours. You see some mighty funny and curious things that come in assorted colors.
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Money will not buy happiness, but it will let you be unhappy in nice places.
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Smile first thing in the morning. Get it over with.
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Never give a sucker an even break.
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