Quote

Never work with animals or children.

W. C. Fields

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

W. C. Fields
Age: 66 †
Born: 1880
Born: January 29
Died: 1946
Died: December 25
Actor
Cabaret Artist
Circus Performer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
WC Fields
William Claude Dukenfield
W.C. Fields
Work
Never
Animals
Animal
Children

More quotes by W. C. Fields

Image
The first thing any comedian does on getting an unscheduled laugh is to verify the state of his .
W. C. Fields
Image
Marry an outdoors woman. Then if you throw her out into the yard on a cold night, she can still survive.
W. C. Fields
Image
The cost of living has gone up another dollar a quart.
W. C. Fields
Image
Never give a sucker an even break.
W. C. Fields
Image
There are seven natural openings in the head and body. A lawyer is the only human being with eight. The extra one is a slot to store money in, should his bank be unable to hold all of it.
W. C. Fields
Image
It ain't what they call you, it's what you answer to.
W. C. Fields
Image
Oh, insomnia! Ah, well, I know a good cure for it... Get plenty of sleep.
W. C. Fields
Image
A merry Christmas to all my friends except two.
W. C. Fields
Image
I like thieves. Some of my best friends are thieves. Why, just last week we had the president of the bank over for dinner.
W. C. Fields
Image
Remember, Lady Godiva put all she had on a horse and she lost her shirt!
W. C. Fields
Image
I like my films to influence the audience. Even if it means tripping their aged grandparents with a cane when they get home.
W. C. Fields
Image
Scotch needs water like a fish needs a bicycle.
W. C. Fields
Image
I never drink water... fish f**k in it.
W. C. Fields
Image
I don't know why I ever come in here. The flies get the best of everything.
W. C. Fields
Image
I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.
W. C. Fields
Image
I write my scripts short and they develop on the set, which I have found a far better premise both economically and practically.
W. C. Fields
Image
Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water.
W. C. Fields
Image
Show me a great actor and I'll show you a lousy husband. Show me a great actress, and you've seen the devil.
W. C. Fields
Image
I ad lib most of my dialogue. If I did remember my lines, it would be too bad for me.
W. C. Fields
Image
Trust everybody, but cut the cards yourself.
W. C. Fields