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I personally stay away from natural foods. At my age I need all the preservatives I can get.

W. C. Fields

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W. C. Fields
Age: 66 †
Born: 1880
Born: January 29
Died: 1946
Died: December 25
Actor
Cabaret Artist
Circus Performer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
WC Fields
William Claude Dukenfield
W.C. Fields
Witty
Needs
Personally
Stay
Age
Funny
Natural
Preservatives
Away
Foods
Need

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I have a poor memory for names but I seldom remember a face.
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You can't trust water: Even a straight stick turns crooked in it.
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Oh, insomnia! Ah, well, I know a good cure for it... Get plenty of sleep.
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Ultimately chess is just chess - not the best thing in the world and not the worst thing in the world, but there is nothing quite like it.
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I drink with impunity...or anyone else who invites me.
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I'm looking for loopholes.
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A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her.
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Variant: I was driven to drink by a woman. I am forever grateful, yet I never had the good manners to thank her.
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Happiness means quiet nerves.
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