Quote

I once donated a pint of my finest red corpuscles to the great American Red Cross and the doctor opined my blood was very helpful contained so much alcohol they could use it to sterilize their instruments.

W. C. Fields

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

W. C. Fields
Age: 66 †
Born: 1880
Born: January 29
Died: 1946
Died: December 25
Actor
Cabaret Artist
Circus Performer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
WC Fields
William Claude Dukenfield
W.C. Fields
Doctors
Finest
Drinking
Helpful
Blood
Doctor
American
Alcohol
Sterilize
Use
Red
Donated
Great
Cross
Pint
Much
Crosses
Pints
Instruments
Contained

More quotes by W. C. Fields

Image
My main ambition as a gardener is to water my orange trees with gin, then all I have to do is squeeze the juice into a glass.
W. C. Fields
Image
Never give a sucker an even break.
W. C. Fields
Image
No doubt exists that all women are crazy it's only a question of degree.
W. C. Fields
Image
Ye Gads, no! I couldn't stand the noise.
W. C. Fields
Image
I've been barbecued, stewed, screwed, tattooed, and fried by people claiming to be my friends. The human race has gone backward, not forward, since the days we were apes swinging through the trees.
W. C. Fields
Image
The laziest man I ever met put popcorn in his pancakes so they would turn over by themselves.
W. C. Fields
Image
I have spent a lot of time searching through the Bible for loopholes.
W. C. Fields
Image
A thing worth having is a thing worth cheating for.
W. C. Fields
Image
I drink with impunity...or anyone else who invites me.
W. C. Fields
Image
Few things in life are more embarrassing than the necessity of having to inform an old friend that you have just got engaged to his fiancee.
W. C. Fields
Image
I always made up my own acts built them out of my knowledge and observation of real life. I'd had wonderful opportunities to study people and every time I went out on the stage I tried to show the audience some bit of true human nature.
W. C. Fields
Image
A man without a woman is like a neck without a pain.
W. C. Fields
Image
Thou shalt not steal-only from other comedians.
W. C. Fields
Image
Never work with animals or children.
W. C. Fields
Image
All my available funds are completely tied up in cash.
W. C. Fields
Image
My heart is a bargain today. Will you take it?
W. C. Fields
Image
I can do anything I want to do!
W. C. Fields
Image
It is impossible to find twelve fair men in all the world.
W. C. Fields
Image
When life hands you lemons, make whisky sours.
W. C. Fields
Image
If I had to live my life over, I'd live over a saloon.
W. C. Fields