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I feel like a midget with muddy feet had been walking over my tongue all night.
W. C. Fields
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W. C. Fields
Age: 66 †
Born: 1880
Born: January 29
Died: 1946
Died: December 25
Actor
Cabaret Artist
Circus Performer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
WC Fields
William Claude Dukenfield
W.C. Fields
Food
Night
Feel
Midget
Feels
Muddy
Like
Tongue
Drinking
Walking
Feet
More quotes by W. C. Fields
Remember, Lady Godiva put all she had on a horse and she lost her shirt!
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I write my scripts short and they develop on the set, which I have found a far better premise both economically and practically.
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I don't drink water. Have you seen the way it rusts pipes?
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A man without a woman is like a neck without a pain.
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A thing worth having is a thing worth cheating for.
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There are seven natural openings in the head and body. A lawyer is the only human being with eight. The extra one is a slot to store money in, should his bank be unable to hold all of it.
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It ain't what they call you, it's what you answer to.
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I never eat before breakfast.
W. C. Fields
I'm looking for loopholes.
W. C. Fields
If it does not work the first time, try, try again. Then quit. No need to be an idiot.
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I only drink to steady my nerves... sometimes I'm so steady I don't move for months.
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Children should neither be seen or heard from - ever again.
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I didn't say the meat was tough. I said I didn't see the horse that is usually outside.
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Ain't fit for man nor beast
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Ultimately chess is just chess - not the best thing in the world and not the worst thing in the world, but there is nothing quite like it.
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You can fool some of the people some of the time -- and that's enough to make a decent living.
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Show me a great actor and I'll show you a lousy husband. Show me a great actress, and you've seen the devil.
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Yes I do like children ... Girl children...about eighteen or twenty.
W. C. Fields
Drown in a cold vat of whiskey? Death, where is thy sting?
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If pigs had wings, they would be pigeons.
W. C. Fields
