Share
×
Inspirational Quotes
Authors
Professions
Topics
Tags
Quote
The two-headed boy in the circus never had such a headache.
W. C. Fields
Share
Change background
T
T
T
Change font
Original
TAGS & TOPICS
W. C. Fields
Age: 66 †
Born: 1880
Born: January 29
Died: 1946
Died: December 25
Actor
Cabaret Artist
Circus Performer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
WC Fields
William Claude Dukenfield
W.C. Fields
Drinking
Boys
Two
Never
Headache
Circus
Headed
More quotes by W. C. Fields
Trust everybody, but cut the cards yourself.
W. C. Fields
I have a poor memory for names but I seldom remember a face.
W. C. Fields
Horse sense is the thing a horse has which keeps it from betting on people.
W. C. Fields
Bert Williams was the funniest man I ever saw and the saddest man I ever knew.
W. C. Fields
Don't worry about your heart, it will last you as long as you live.
W. C. Fields
In the ten years since I had run away from home...I had gone through more strange experiences than the average person crowds into a whole lifetime.
W. C. Fields
It's a wonderful thing, the D.T.'s. You can travel the world in a couple of hours. You see some mighty funny and curious things that come in assorted colors.
W. C. Fields
Everybody's got to believe in something. I believe I'll have another beer.
W. C. Fields
Indeed, moderation is my middle name (though I do not often use it in signing legal documents)
W. C. Fields
Ultimately chess is just chess - not the best thing in the world and not the worst thing in the world, but there is nothing quite like it.
W. C. Fields
Thou shalt not kill anything less than a fifth.
W. C. Fields
All my available funds are completely tied up in cash.
W. C. Fields
I never drink water... fish f**k in it.
W. C. Fields
After two days in the hospital, I turn to the nurse.
W. C. Fields
You can't cheat an honest man.
W. C. Fields
Never cry over spilt milk, because it may have been poisoned.
W. C. Fields
The first thing any comedian does on getting an unscheduled laugh is to verify the state of his .
W. C. Fields
There's no such thing as a tough child - if you parboil them first for seven hours, they always come out tender.
W. C. Fields
I drink with impunity...or anyone else who invites me.
W. C. Fields
I drink therefore I am.
W. C. Fields
