Quote

Variant: I was driven to drink by a woman. I am forever grateful, yet I never had the good manners to thank her.

W. C. Fields

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W. C. Fields
Age: 66 †
Born: 1880
Born: January 29
Died: 1946
Died: December 25
Actor
Cabaret Artist
Circus Performer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
WC Fields
William Claude Dukenfield
W.C. Fields
Grateful
Drink
Forever
Woman
Variant
Good
Drunkenness
Never
Manners
Thank
Driven

More quotes by W. C. Fields

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It's morally wrong to allow a sucker to keep his money.
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If I ever found a church that didn't believe in knocking all the other churches, I might consider joining it.
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I've been on a 46-year diet of olives and alcohol. The latter I consume. The former I save and use over again in more alcohol. In my lifetime, I imagine, I have consumed at least $200,000 worth of whisky.
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When you wake up in the morning, smile - and get it over with.
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I've never hit a woman in my life. Not even my own mother.
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If there's a will, prosperity can't be far behind.
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I could juggle anything in my day. Balls, cigar boxes, knives...But there was one thing I could never juggle. My income tax.
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I have spent a lot of time searching through the Bible for loopholes.
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Smile first thing in the morning. Get it over with.
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It is impossible to find twelve fair men in all the world.
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I never met a kid I liked.
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Oh, insomnia! Ah, well, I know a good cure for it... Get plenty of sleep.
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A merry Christmas to all my friends except two.
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California is the only state in the union where you can fall asleep under a rose bush in full bloom and freeze to death.
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I drink with impunity...or anyone else who invites me.
W. C. Fields
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Yes I do like children ... Girl children...about eighteen or twenty.
W. C. Fields
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Was I in here last night and did I spend a $20 bill? Oh, thank goodness... I thought I'd lost it.
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Money will not buy happiness, but it will let you be unhappy in nice places.
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I don't object to nine aces in one deck. But when a man lays down five aces in one hand... and besides, I know what I dealt him!
W. C. Fields
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I have been advised by the best medical authority, at my age, not to attempt to give up alcohol.
W. C. Fields