Share
×
Inspirational Quotes
Authors
Professions
Topics
Tags
Quote
I have been advised by the best medical authority, at my age, not to attempt to give up alcohol.
W. C. Fields
Share
Change background
T
T
T
Change font
Original
TAGS & TOPICS
W. C. Fields
Age: 66 †
Born: 1880
Born: January 29
Died: 1946
Died: December 25
Actor
Cabaret Artist
Circus Performer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
WC Fields
William Claude Dukenfield
W.C. Fields
Give
Best
Advised
Giving
Beer
Attempt
Alcohol
Medical
Authority
Age
More quotes by W. C. Fields
When life hands you lemons, make whisky sours.
W. C. Fields
All the men in my family were bearded, and most of the women.
W. C. Fields
Ye Gads, no! I couldn't stand the noise.
W. C. Fields
I feel like a midget with muddy feet had been walking over my tongue all night.
W. C. Fields
I'm free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally.
W. C. Fields
The two-headed boy in the circus never had such a headache.
W. C. Fields
Money will not buy happiness, but it will let you be unhappy in nice places.
W. C. Fields
Reality is an illusion that occurs due to the lack of alcohol.
W. C. Fields
I never worry about being driven to drink I just worry about being driven home.
W. C. Fields
Thou shalt not steal-only from other comedians.
W. C. Fields
I could be stranded in any town in the United States with ten cents and within an hour make $20 with the shell game.
W. C. Fields
Reminds me of my safari in Africa. Somebody forgot the corkscrew and for several days we had to live on nothing but food and water.
W. C. Fields
Some people are born losers others acquire the knack gradually.
W. C. Fields
I always keep a supply of stimulant handy in case I see a snake, which I also keep handy.
W. C. Fields
The funniest thing a comedian can do is not do it.
W. C. Fields
So long as the presence of death lurks with anyone who goes through the simple act of swallowing, I will make mine whiskey.
W. C. Fields
The first thing any comedian does on getting an unscheduled laugh is to verify the state of his .
W. C. Fields
Philadelphia, wonderful town, spent a week there one night
W. C. Fields
I never smoked a cigar in my life until I was nine
W. C. Fields
Remember, Lady Godiva put all she had on a horse and she lost her shirt!
W. C. Fields
