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Philadelphia, wonderful town, spent a week there one night
W. C. Fields
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W. C. Fields
Age: 66 †
Born: 1880
Born: January 29
Died: 1946
Died: December 25
Actor
Cabaret Artist
Circus Performer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
WC Fields
William Claude Dukenfield
W.C. Fields
Towns
Spent
Week
Wonderful
Night
Philadelphia
Town
More quotes by W. C. Fields
I'd rather have two girls at 21 each than one girl at 42.
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Ah, the patter of little feet around the house. There's nothing like having a midget for a butler.
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There is not a man in America who has not had a secret ambition to boot an infant.
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If there's a will, prosperity can't be far behind.
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I was almost put out of business by a well-meaning corpse.
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I don't drink water. Have you seen the way it rusts pipes?
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Few things in life are more embarrassing than the necessity of having to inform an old friend that you have just got engaged to his fiancee.
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Back in my rummy days, I would tremble and shake for hours upon arising. It was the only exercise I got.
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I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.
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I've been drunk only once in my life. But that lasted for twenty-three years.
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There's no such thing as a tough child - if you parboil them first for seven hours, they always come out tender.
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The Punkwat twins! Brentwood is the world's smallest giant, whilst his brother, Elwood, is the largest midget in the world. They baffle science!
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I like my films to influence the audience. Even if it means tripping their aged grandparents with a cane when they get home.
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I have spent a lot of time searching through the Bible for loopholes.
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I never eat before breakfast.
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California is the only state in the union where you can fall asleep under a rose bush in full bloom and freeze to death.
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The funniest thing about comedy is that you never know why people laugh. I know what makes them laugh but trying to get your hands on the why of it is like trying to pick an eel out of a tub of water.
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Business is an establishment that gives you the legal, even though unethical, right to screw the naive-right, left, and in the middle.
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I am an expert of electricity. My father occupied the chair of applied electricity at the state prison.
W. C. Fields
If pigs had wings, they would be pigeons.
W. C. Fields
