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A thing worth having is a thing worth cheating for.

W. C. Fields

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W. C. Fields
Age: 66 †
Born: 1880
Born: January 29
Died: 1946
Died: December 25
Actor
Cabaret Artist
Circus Performer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
WC Fields
William Claude Dukenfield
W.C. Fields
Cheating
Worth
Thing

More quotes by W. C. Fields

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I ad lib most of my dialogue. If I did remember my lines, it would be too bad for me.
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Wouldn't it be terrible if I quoted some reliable statistics which prove that more people are driven insane through religious hysteria than by drinking alcohol.
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Never work with animals or children.
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Alcoholic: anybody who drinks more than I do.
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A comic should suffer as much over a single line as a man with a hernia would in picking up a heavy barbell.
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I'm free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally.
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I've been drunk only once in my life. But that lasted for twenty-three years.
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I can do anything I want to do!
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If pigs had wings, they would be pigeons.
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The movie people would have nothing to do with me until they heard me speak in a Broadway play, then they all wanted to sign me for the silent movies.
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Money will not buy happiness, but it will let you be unhappy in nice places.
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No man is boss in his own home, but he can make up for it, he thinks, by making a dog play dead.
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Sex isn't necessary. You don't die without it, but you can die having it.
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Always carry a flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite, and furthermore always carry a small snake.
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It ain't what they call you, it's what you answer to.
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There is not a man in America who has not had a secret ambition to boot an infant.
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My heart is a bargain today. Will you take it?
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In the ten years since I had run away from home...I had gone through more strange experiences than the average person crowds into a whole lifetime.
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Drown in a cold vat of whiskey? Death, where is thy sting?
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A man without a woman is like a neck without a pain.
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