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The cost of living has gone up another dollar a quart.
W. C. Fields
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W. C. Fields
Age: 66 †
Born: 1880
Born: January 29
Died: 1946
Died: December 25
Actor
Cabaret Artist
Circus Performer
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
WC Fields
William Claude Dukenfield
W.C. Fields
Living
Quart
Another
Alcoholism
Dollar
Alcohol
Drinking
Dollars
Cost
Gone
More quotes by W. C. Fields
I could be stranded in any town in the United States with ten cents and within an hour make $20 with the shell game.
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All things considered, I'd rather be in Philadelphia
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I don't object to nine aces in one deck. But when a man lays down five aces in one hand... and besides, I know what I dealt him!
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I once donated a pint of my finest red corpuscles to the great American Red Cross and the doctor opined my blood was very helpful contained so much alcohol they could use it to sterilize their instruments.
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I've been asked if I ever get the DTs. I don't know. It's hard to tell where Hollywood ends and the DTs begin.
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Children should neither be seen or heard from - ever again.
W. C. Fields
It was a marriage of convenience, as my father had a blister on his big toe and couldn't travel far to find a girl.
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A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money.
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I was almost put out of business by a well-meaning corpse.
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It is impossible to find twelve fair men in all the world.
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I feel like a midget with muddy feet had been walking over my tongue all night.
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The income tax was devised to give lawyers and certified public accountants business. Few persons can make head, tail, or middle out of it. Einstein admitted he couldn't.
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When we have lost everything, including hope, life becomes a disgrace, and death a duty.
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I don't drink anymore, on the other hand I don't drink any less either.
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Smile first thing in the morning. Get it over with.
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Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water.
W. C. Fields
Fields' reply: He'd think I was a sissy.
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Bert Williams was the funniest man I ever saw and the saddest man I ever knew.
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Beer: Helping ugly people have sex since 3000 B. C.
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Thou shalt not kill anything less than a fifth.
W. C. Fields